Author Archives: eps992014

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About eps992014

a believer in the Lord Jesus Christ, a mother, wife, sometime runner, singer, gardener, and proud Scot

It can be complicated..

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You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely. You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain.

(Ps 139.1-6)

Shout for joy, you heavens; rejoice, you earth; burst into song, you mountains! For the Lord comforts his people and will have compassion on his afflicted ones… 

(Isa 49.13)

I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me – just as the Father knows me and I know the Father..

(Jn 10.14&15)

Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

(Phil 3.4-7)

Have you ever been totally disconcerted by your own reactions and feelings, finding that what is expected of you, by other people and by yourself, is totally different from the reality? Human beings are so much more complicated than we realise, and it is one of the most comforting things about being a beloved child of God, that our Father knows us better than we do, and He accepts us in all our confusion.

In the past few months, I have moved away from a community, a life, an environment, which I loved. I am living now in a season of uncertainty, with no clarity about the long-term future and hence no capacity to either commit to the place we now live, or to make plans. I have also just become a grand-parent for the first time..

And I am bombarded by messages of congratulation, the expectations that I will be ‘over the moon’ and ‘walking on air’. Nope… There has been overwhelming relief, that all is well and the baby and his parents are beginning to know one another. Thankfulness, for all who are helping to support the new parents in various ways; sadness that we live too far away to be useful in this challenging time; anxiety for the parents as they fight exhaustion, and cope with the unknowns of a new baby. In addition, there is grief over my recent losses, anxiety for our own uncertain future and its consequences for life now, and guilt, since I am not reacting the way others expect and my emotions are continually tripping me up. It’s all very messy!

What a relief then that I am in the safe-keeping of a tender loving Father, who knows me through and through! I am not judged by my Father for my mixed-up emotions, and he invites me to shift their burden onto his shoulders, so that I may rest in his love and strength. All the feelings are valid responses to real events in my life, and each one prompts me to bring my situation to my Father in prayer, to tell him all that I feel and confess where I am fearful and anxious instead of trusting. He accepts me, with all this baggage, and holds me fast, inviting me to embrace the truth of his love and purposes of good for me.

How marvellous to have such a Father, such a companion through life! One who never loses patience with me, or is in a bad mood and unable to make time for me; one who is always loving, gentle, compassionate and firm when I need to be challenged and have my thinking straightened out by his truth. I worship this God, the Creator who knows all and still loves me, I praise and thank him for the safest of safe places where I am held tight in his arms and kept.

Loving Father, I rest in your love for me and in the assurance that you know me through and through. I praise you that I can come as I am, at any time, and unburden myself to you. I praise you that in Christ I am accepted and beloved, and your plans for me are to be trusted. 

As I rest in your love today, I pray that I might be renewed in trust and become steadier to face my circumstances and love those to whom you have called me. Let me hand over my burdens, that I may be free to have compassion on others and to have wisdom in loving them in turn. Thank you for all those who have modelled your love in accepting me with all my confusion. May I in turn love as you have loved me, not judging others in their particular and unique needs, but bringing them to your light and truth and ever-open arms.

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A patchwork of praise and petition..

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To the lead player, a David psalm.

In You, O Lord, I shelter. Let me never be shamed. In Your bounty, O free me. Incline Your ear to me. Quick, save me.

Be my stronghold of rock, a fort-house to rescue me. For You are my crag and my bastion, and for Your name’s sake guide me and lead me. Get me out of the net that they laid for me, for You are my stronghold.

In Your hand I commend my spirit. You redeemed me, O Lord, God of truth. I hate those who look to vaporous lies. As for me, I trust in the Lord. Let me exult and rejoice in Your kindness, that You saw my affliction, You knew the straits of my life. And You did not yield me to my enemy’s hand, You set my feet in a wide-open place.

Grant me grace, Lord, for I am distressed….. For all my enemies I become a disgrace, just as much to my neighbours, and fear to my friends. Those who see me outside draw back from me. Forgotten from the heart like the dead, I become like a vessel lost…

As for me, I trust in You, O Lord. I say, “You are my God.” My times are in Your hand – O save me from the hand of my enemies, my pursuers. Shine Your face on Your servant, rescue me in Your kindness. Lord, let me not be shamed, for I call You….

How great Your goodness that You hid for those who fear You. You have wrought for those who shelter in You before the eyes of humankind. Conceal them in the hiding-place of Your presence from the crookedness of man……

Love the Lord, all his faithful, steadfastness the Lord keeps … Be strong, and let your heart be firm, all who hope in the Lord.

(Psalm 31.1-12,15-18,20&21,24&25: R. Alter translation*)

A few years ago, I received a new translation of the book of Psalms, by a notable Hebrew scholar, annotated with his own observations on the texts and their meaning. I have dipped into it occasionally since then, and often find that the sparse and fresh expression of texts which in older translations are very familiar, is refreshing and enriching. This particular psalm is introduced with the observation that many of the phrases and images are echoes of other psalms and parts of the bible – the books of Job and Jeremiah. I loved the idea that the author, whoever they were, did not hesitate to take words and ideas from all over their scriptures in order to praise God and to express their prayers.

Jesus makes a very explicit point in teaching his disciples, that prayer is not about the cleverness of one’s words, or the length of one’s sentences, but about honesty and straight-dealing with our God, from whom nothing is hidden. And I think that we should never be ashamed when we find ourselves using the words of others to praise or bring our petitions to God – when someone has found ways to express what we think and feel in powerful ways, we naturally find ourselves using their images and words ourselves!

The danger in using other people’s words comes when we do so unthinking, relying on their clever or powerful language to make our case, instead of truly meaning what we say. I know that some particularly well-beloved hymns are very difficult to sing meaningfully because I know them off by heart and can repeat the words parrot-fashion… that is not worship, or prayer.

In this case, we find the psalmist gathering images which speak powerfully of God’s care, of strength and refuge, of deliverance and reasons to hope – ultimately, hoping in God’s desire that all be done to honour his name and glory… so that His name will be hallowed and exalted as his power, love and justice are witnessed at work on behalf of his people. There is urgency, and passion, and also a deep understanding of God’s faithfulness to those who trust in him alone. As I read these words in a fresh translation, I am stimulated to think about where my trust is, and to make this psalm a true prayer of my own.

Let us rejoice that we have so many sources from which to draw as we come to God in prayer and praise – all the riches of the Hebrew scriptures; all the dynamic and beautiful texts of the gospels and letters; the incredible treasury of texts written by saints through the ages of the church and the hymns and songs which God’s people use in worship. May God keep us sincere and truthful in our prayer and praising, no matter where our words come from, fiull of thankfulness for his goodness to us in every way.

(The Book of Psalms – a translation with commentary: Robert Alter, 2007, WW Norton &Co Ltd London)

It’s not rules, it’s a relationship

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Lead me in your truth and instruct me, for you are the God of my rescue. In you do I hope every day…. whosoever the man who fears the Lord, he will guide him in the way he should choose..

Guard my life and save me. Let me not be shamed, for I shelter in you. May uprightness, wholeness, preserve me, for in you do I hope.

(Ps 25.5,12,20&21; R Alter translation)

O Lord, be gracious to us; we long for you. Be our strength every morning, our salvation in time of distress… The Lord is exalted, for he dwells on high; he will fill Zion with justice and righteousness. He will be the sure foundation for your times, a rich store of salvation and wisdom and knowledge; the fear of the Lord is the key to this treasure.

(Isa 33.2,5&6)

“I am the way and the truth and the life. No-one comes to the Father except through me.”

(Jn 14.6)

I want them to experience all the wealth of definite understanding, and to come to the knowledge of God’s mystery – the Messiah, the king! He is the place where you’ll find all the hidden treasures of wisdom and knowledge. I’m saying this so that nobody will deceive you with plausible words… So, then, just as you received King Jesus as Lord, you must continue your journey in him. You must put down healthy roots in him, being built up brick by brick in him, and established strongly in the faith, just as you were taught, with overflowing thankfulness.

(Col 2.2-7, NT Wright translation)

I can’t unsee him; the king who loved me enough to die for me; the Lord of heaven’s armies who came into this pain-wracked, beautiful world as a human infant; the one and only way by which all the evil, broken, painful things are to be set right and God’s glorious kingdom established in the world which he made for us to enjoy with him.

Many things cloud my vision; so many questions and puzzles which I cannot unravel, and which are beyond human skill to unpick. And yet, in spite of these – to some people – reasons to reject Jesus and all the supposed ‘revelation’ of God, I cannot unsee him. Jesus is not some clever add-on to my armoury of ways to cope with life. Jesus is not some super spiritual experience which somehow enhances my days. Jesus is not an extra, or an optional accessory. Jesus is simply the only person who actually begins to make sense of everything, as I finally see how everything revolves around him. Knowing Jesus doesn’t take away pain, grief, confusion or loss. Knowing Jesus doesn’t mean that I can answer the deep questions about evil and suffering easily. BUT, knowing Jesus means that I have an anchor, a person whose love for me is sure and whose power to keep me for an eternal future is guaranteed.

It’s not a question of obeying rules, in order to earn favour with some capricious deity; it’s a matter of having my eyes opened to eternal realities and having seen Jesus there, being unable to look away and pretend that he doesn’t exist. He is; He was; and He will always be.. what am I doing in response to the truth of his lordship, his power, his coming kingdom? If I reject what I have seen and choose to stay away from Jesus, then I reject ultimate reality and one day will be proved to have made a catastrophic error. But I thank God that I can and do acknowledge Jesus as Lord, as the beginning and end of everything, and not only so but I can know and be known by him. It is a marvel beyond telling, that we should be invited into a loving relationship with Truth and Life, with Love and Power, yet we are, and his name is Jesus.

As I grow through life, I find Paul’s advice to be true – in every stage of my journey, what I need is more of Jesus – he must become greater in me, more glorious in my understanding, more important in my thinking, more effectively the motivation and foundation of all I do.

Christianity, says the old slogan, is Christ. Put him in the middle of your picture of the world, and the world will stop spinning in incomprehensible circles and begin to make sense…. He is, quite simply, what it’s all about.

(NT Wright: p 162, Paul for Everyone; the Prison letters: 2002, SPCK)

Travelling light?

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Though the fig tree does not bud and there are no grapes on the vines, though the olive crop fails and the fields produce no food, though there are no sheep in the pen and no cattle in the stalls, yet I will rejoice in the Lord, I will be joyful in God my saviour. The sovereign Lord is my strength..

(Hab 3.17-19)

Then Jesus came to them and said;”… And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

(Matt 28.18&20)

I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings…. Not that I have already obtained all this, or have been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me… But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining towards what is ahead, I press on towards the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenwards in Christ Jesus… 

Rejoice in the Lord always.. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus…. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, … I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

(Phil 3.10,12-14; 4.4-7, 12&13)

How good it is, as a child of God, to know that when He says, “Go, let this place and these people become your past”, that I can trust him for the unknown future. I am so thankful for the people and experiences which have made up my life, but also aware that they are fleeting things, and cannot be carried with me into the next chapter.

I have memories, and a few physical reminders, but am aware of the gift of God in allowing me to let the past go, and not to cart its baggage into tomorrow. I can rest in the relinquishment because it is my loving Father who asks it of me, and he holds so many good things for me to enjoy and thank him for in the future. Ultimately, I have nothing to take with me in the face of advancing years and death, but the assurance that I belong to Jesus and he will keep me safe through all that is permitted. No treasured memories, no relationships, no material belongings, nothing at all can carry me through what lies ahead except Jesus.

When the past threatens to ambush my present, bringing bitterness, regret, an overwhelming sense of loss, I have a choice to make. Will I allow myself to be disabled by the tide, swept into a storm of grief and complaint against God? Or will I choose to pray… to rejoice that I have known so many good gifts from God; that I can trust his wisdom in giving and withdrawing those gifts; that through the experience of his gifts, I have learnt more about God and his faithfulness and love for me?

Paul had learnt to make that choice well, to go for thanksgiving and the prayer which trusts the loving heart of the listener. The Father who made us knows what wrings our hearts and what would weigh us down; he gives us the opportunity to cast that burden back on him, by giving thanks for what is now lost to us, and trusting that in his providence, we are no less loved and cared for than when we enjoyed those most painfully lost gifts – of people, of health, of material prosperity, whatever they are…

Dear friends, your grief and my grief are known to our father, and he waits to see what we will do with it. His spirit moves us towards his loving heart in faith, and invites us to choose trust, to choose not to try to carry all that is past with us into the future but to believe that in our God, in Father, Son and Spirit, we will know all that really matters and be gifted with contentment. May we learn to let the past with all its joys and sorrows be something that is in God’s keeping, and not fret over carrying it ourselves.. may we travel lightly and hopefully towards the glory which is our future with him.

We are family..

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But now in Christ Jesus you who once were far away have been brought near through the blood of Christ. For he himself is our peace, who has made the two one… For through him we both have access to the Father by one Spirit. Consequently, you are no longer foreigners and aliens, but fellow-citizens with God’s people and members of God’s household, built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets, with Christ Jesus himself as the chief cornerstone. In him the whole building is joined together and rises to become a holy temple in the Lord. And in him you too are being built together to become a dwelling in which God lives by his spirit.

And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge – that you may be filled to the measure of all the fulness of God.

Make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit – just as you were called to one hope when you were called – one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.

(Eph 2.13&14,18-22; 3.17-19; 4.3-6)

Nearly a month ago, I left the church community which has been my family for seven years ago, and moved across the country. I left behind faithful friends, people who have loved and supported and encouraged me, and whom I in turn have sought to love in Jesus’ name. Our last service together included that precious time of remembrance, when those who trust in him for salvation take bread and wine, take time to consider again what price was paid for our forgiveness, and take time to give thanks for one another – the family which God has created for himself.

The family of God around the world today is multicultural, multi-lingual, and yet we are taught that in Christ, we are one. Our unity is not a thing of uniformity, of shared language or tradition, but a glorious technicoloured celebration of diverse peoples who all call Jesus their Lord and Saviour. Our unity is founded solely in him, and in the effectiveness of his work on the cross to defeat sin, death and evil for us once and for ever.

This week, I took the bread and wine again, in a different building, with different believers around me. And I remembered again that Jesus died to make me his own, to unite me with all his precious brothers and sisters, those whom I love and miss, and those to whom I have been called in this time, these new family members who sit around me. How deeply thankful I am that wherever I go in the world, I have family. I can go to a gathering of Jesus’ followers and even if I understand very little of their language, I can share with them in praising God and celebrating my Saviour. The unity of his children is real – and in spite of the disgraceful habit which we have, of falling out and putting up fences, we still share so much more than any of the things that divide us!

The more we can focus on Jesus, on his love and power, his beauty and his high calling on our lives, the closer we are drawn to one another. Before God’s throne, where Jesus stands ever as our great High Priest, there is no distance at all between God’s children as they pray and call for him to work out his purposes and reveal his glory. When I come to intercede for my friends in India or Mexico, or to remember those whom I left behind last month, I am shoulder to shoulder with them as we spend time in God’s presence.

It is particularly sweet to me in this initial time of loss, to know that those whom I have left behind are not lost to God, but are precious to him and he will bring them safe into his presence. Even if in this world I do not see some of them again, I know that we will one day be together in glory, enjoying the new creation and praising our precious Jesus together. None of God’s children are lost to us when they go ahead into glory, we miss them, but only for a time and how we cherish that reassurance. I can place those whom I left behind into God’s safe keeping, and have peace that He will do all things well for them as for me. How great and good is our Father, to whom we owe everything and from whom we receive grace upon grace!

O Lord, such pain..

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Surely the arm of the Lord is not too short to save, nor his ear too dull to hear. But your iniquities have separated you from your God; your sins have hidden his face from you, so that he will not hear. For your hands are stained with blood, your fingers with guilt. Your lips have spoken lies, and your tongue mutters wicked things.

No-one calls for justice; no-one pleads his case with integrity. They rely on empty arguments and speak lies; they conceive trouble and give birth to evil…Their deeds are evil deeds, and acts of violence are in their hands..

The way of peace they do not know; there is no justice in their paths. They have turned them into crooked roads; no-one who walks in them will know peace. So justice is far from us, and righteousness does not reach us. We look for light, but all is darkness:”

(Isa 591-4,6&8-9)

“O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing. Look, your house is left to you desolate. For I tell you, you will not see me again until you say, ‘Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord’.”

(Matt 23.37-39)

O Lord, what bitterness and despair come upon us as we consider what is happening today in our world. Nation at war with nation; regimes scheming and manipulating the lives of millions for economic and political ends. Implacable hatreds being fed by rhetoric, biased re-tellings of history, entrenched positions which must be defended and therefore justified at any cost. 

The agony and the anger together scream at us through our phones’ newsfeed, our newspaper headlines, and we cannot blot them out. The intractable and utterly tangled webs of history continue to give birth to pain, cruelty, human brutality and all forms of violence and destruction. 

The narrative of history is made up of the lives of millions of individuals, each one precious and known to you. The great stories of nations are worked out in the details of my life and the lives of people like me around the world – the small, ordinary ones who never pretended to have authority or to understand the trajectories of power. It is the suffering of the small people which rips the guts out of us. We see ourselves in their faces as they search for loved ones under the rubble of bombed buildings; we see our children in the limp bodies carried from battlefields; we see our elders in the frail forms stumbling from pitiful shelter to shelter in an effort to escape the violence.

Fear and hatred are breeding fear and hatred, as they have always done and will continue to do until you return to bring an end to the pain and darkness… how long, O Lord, will it be? The roots of the troubles lie so far back in history, and are so overgrown with all that has happened through the intervening years – with all its partial truth-telling, and inadequately understood motivations – that in many places there seems no hope of any resolution which can bring peace and justice. Where is your perfect judgement, O Lord? Where is your healing peace?

For all those who today are immersed in conflict, violence and fear, who know you as Lord, and call upon Jesus as their saviour, I pray today. May they be given the courage they need to face whatever happens with faith in you. May they be given the moment-by-moment strength to live for you in their own situation, and to point others to their only hope – Jesus. May they shine as lights in the darkness, and testify to your presence. May they not fear death, since it will bring them home to you. May they be given courage as they watch loved ones suffer, and may their faith not fail.

For all those today who are in positions of power – to authorise or restrain violence; to advise for or against destruction; to act in mercy or to act in ruthlessness – I pray, O Lord. In your sovereignty, work out peace, justice and healing so that the suffering will be ended. May those in power be appalled at what they have let loose, and instead bend all their efforts toward peace, seeking to promote the well-being of their people without violence and with justice.

Lord, God of the nations, it is only by your power at work in human hearts that such things can come about. Of ourselves, we are hopeless and helpless to stem this tide of evil. Your people beg that you will have mercy, that your spirit might move to transform darkness to light and bring peace where there is no peace. Your arm, O Lord, is mighty to save; your heart is full of compassion; let us see your kingdom come! 

Where are you?

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Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the Lord God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the Lord God among the trees of the garden. But the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?” He answered, “I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid.”

(Gen 3.8-10)

The angel of the Lord found Hagar near a spring in the desert…. And he said, “Hagar, servant of Sarai, where have you come from, and where are you going?”  “I’m running away from my mistress Sarai,” She answered. then the angel of the Lord told her, “Go back… I will so increase your descendants that they will be too numerous to count.”… She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: “You are the God who sees me,”

(Gen 15.7-10&13)

Then a voice said to him: “What are you doing here Elijah?” He replied, “I have been very zealous for the Lord God Almighty. The Israelites have rejected your covenant, broken down your altars, and put your prophets to death with the sword I am the only one left, and now they are trying to kill me too.”… The Lord said to him, “Go back the way you came…. I reserve seven thousand in Israel – all whose knees have not bowed down to Baal”…

(1 Kgs 19.13-15&18)

O Lord, you have searched me and you now me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways..

If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you.

(Ps 139 1-3,11&12)

Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. And even the very hairs of your head are numbered. so don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows. 

(Matt 10.29-31)

Does God ever lose people? Have you ever wondered just why, in the story of the garden after Adam and Eve have eaten the forbidden fruit and are hiding, did God ask where they were? Surely He knew?!

One of the most comforting – and challenging – things that we find about God as revealed in the scriptures is his omniscience, or all-knowingness. We are told that there is absolutely nothing – in any realm of creation, and inside our own minds and hearts – which escapes God’s eye and comprehension. There is nowhere, literally in anything that exists, which is not open to God. Think about that for a moment or two.. it means that when we shut up our shame over sin, or harbour grudges for the hurt done to us by another – we are wasting our efforts because God sees it all. It means that when evil, or good, are being conceived and carried out anywhere, by anyone, God sees it and can perfectly judge the true justice of every situation. Thus we can be both reassured – we are never lost to God – and challenged – since He clearly sees all our actions, thoughts and motivations.

So, I return to my question.. why does God ask where Adam and Eve have got to? Is it to gave them the opportunity to respond with the truth, to tell it like it is and acknowledge that they have messed up and are in big trouble? I think we can all agree that if a person is plainly in trouble, but refusing to accept that reality, then they cannot be helped. A person needs to acknowledge – to confess or call by its true name – their situation in order to be delivered from it.

When God says to you, or to me today, “Where are you?” what will be the answer? Am I at sea, amid great rolling breakers of pain or suffering which are like to swamp me? Then the Lord reminds me that he is greater than all that assails me, and his power is able to hold me until the stilling of the storm.

Am I part of a happy family party, celebrating connection, anniversaries, shared life and varied experiences? Then the Lord reminds me that all good things come from him, the Father of all, and that as I celebrate and give thanks, I give glory to him.

Am I astray amid doubts and weariness, or in a far country spending my life’s riches on those things which my culture and popular wisdom tell me will bring happiness? Then the Lord, when he calls, invites me to recognise the barrenness of my real situation, and to confess that I am hungry and thirsty the water of life, for the bread and wine of the covenant, for the only thing which will truly satisfy me – Jesus.

As I hear my Lord’s voice today, calling to ask where I am, let me be honest and by the help of the Holy Spirit, confess the truth and share my need, no matter how ashamed of it I may be. Jesus has made sure that my home is with him, and when he says that I matter to my heavenly Father, I can believe it. There is no need for any of God’s children to face life alone, He knows where they are all the time and is waiting to be invited to join them.

..is this all really for me?

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The Lord is my light and my salvation – whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life – of whom shall I be afraid? ….  For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling; he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent and set me high upon a rock.

(Ps 27.1&5)

‘Very truly I tell you, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be judged but has crossed over from death to life.’

(Jn 5.24)

Whoever has ears, let them hear what the Spirit says to the churches. To the one who is victorious, I will give the right to eat from the tree of life, which is in the paradise of God….

The one who is victorious will not be hurt at all by the second death… To the one who is victorious, I will give some of the hidden manna. I will also give that person a white stone with a new name written on it, known only to the one who receives it..

To the one who is victorious and does my will to the end, I will give authority over the nations.. just as I received authority from my Father. I will also give that one the morning star… The one who is victorious will.. be dressed in white. I will never blot out the name of that person from the book of life, but will acknowledge that name before my Father and his angels..

The one who is victorious I will make a pillar in the temple of my God. Never again will they leave it. I will write on them the name of my God and the name of the city of my God, the new Jerusalem, which is coming down out of heaven from my God, and I will also write on them my new name….

To the one who is victorious, I will give the right to sit with me on my throne, just as I was victorious and sat down with my Father on his throne.

(Rev 2.7,11,17,26-28;3.5,12-13,21)

Lord God, almighty and eternally good; Heavenly Father, perfect in compassion and in saving love, hear your child this night. She is weary with loss and parting; with uncertainty and the overwhelming grief of goodbye. Have mercy on your child in her weakness, and may your compassion hem her in with protection from despair and bitterness against you.

Mighty Saviour, zealous for my salvation, transformation and adoption into your Father’s family, I rest in your completed work on my behalf and acknowledge the poverty of my own life before your perfection. I have deserved judgement and condemnation, but have received mercy and grace in abundance. Thank you that as I trust in you, I am clothed in your righteousness, called by your name, assured of a place in glory with the saints which will never be taken from me.

Because it is you, my Lord, who sits upon the throne of glory, and because you sustain your life in me by your spirit, I hold up my head and boast of your power, love and atoning sacrifice. I am kept safe in your dwelling, and have crossed over from death into eternal life – life with all the qualities of the divine; I live your life.

Because it is you, my Lord, who sits upon the throne of glory, and because you have birthed in me the desire to know and love you ever more faithfully, I am confident to face suffering and death, bearing your name and knowing that my place at your side is secure. By your help, I will honour you in all that comes to me, playing the part assigned to me.

You will be faithful to your promises. I can rest in them, and stand firm against the tide of mockery, indifference or hostility that may come. Though the darkness of human evil and the anguish of suffering may rise like a tide to wash me away, yet I will be held safe on the rock of refuge, my Lord and Saviour. You have shown me the eternal realities behind this shadow-play, and I know who it is that truly reigns – it is the Lamb, looking as one who had been slain; it is my Jesus, and I can trust him. Let me be at peace and let his promises strengthen my faith to face all that may come.

Who is this that speaks?

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 ‘Very truly I tell you, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be judged but has crossed over from death to life.. For as the Father has life in himself, so he has granted the Son also to have life in himself. And he has given him authority to judge…

Jesus said.. ‘I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die..

(Jn 5.24-27; 11.25)

When I saw him, I fell at his feet as though dead. Then he placed his right hand on me and said: ‘Do not be afraid. I am the First and the Last. I am the Living One; I was dead, and now look, I am alive for ever and ever! And I hold the keys of death and Hades … These are the words of him who holds the seven stars in his right hand and walks among the seven golden lampstands. I know your deeds…

These are the words of him who has the sharp, double-edged sword. I know where you live… These are the words of the Son of God, whose eyes are like blazing fire and whose feet are like burnished bronze. I know your deeds.. These are the words of him who is holy and true, who holds the key of David. What he opens no one can shut, and what he shuts no one can open. I know your deeds….. These are the words of the Amen, the faithful and true witness, the ruler of God’s creation. I know your deeds…..

Then… I saw a mighty angel proclaiming in a loud voice, ‘Who is worthy to  break the seals and open the scroll?’… Then one of the elders said to me, ‘..see, the Lion of the tribe of Judah, the Root of David, has triumphed. He is able to open the scroll..’ Then I saw a Lamb, looking as if it had been slain, standing at the centre of the throne… And they sang a new song, saying: ‘You are worthy to take the scroll and to open its seals, because you were slain, and with your blood you purchased for God persons from every tribe and language and people and nation. You have made them to be a kingdom and priests to serve our God, and they will reign on the earth.’

(Rev 1.18,2.1,12,18; 3.7.14; 5.5-10)

It is easy for the cares of the world to distract us, for the evil one to beguile us into focussing on humankind and thus lead us into despair, for our own failures to hobble us and hold us back from joyful living. One of the best antidotes to doubt, fear and despair is to bring ourselves back to the truth that we have received about God, about Jesus Christ, about the good news of salvation and all that is purposed for this world by our Maker.

As we find ourselves becoming uneasy and distracted, or even better, before it happens, we can choose to turn our thoughts to the realities which are revealed through scripture, and gain a true perspective, a safe rock on which to stand against the tide of doubt. What better subject to choose for such meditation than the name of our saviour? In the thinking of the writers of scripture, a person’s name is considered as denoting their character and purpose, something which we tend to forget. But once we take this on board and begin to look for all the ways that Jesus is described throughout scripture, we quickly find our minds  lifted onto a very exalted and thrilling plane!

There are so many wonderful ways in which Jesus is described and named for us through the narrative of the bible, and I commend them all to you as worthy sources of fruitful thought and meditation. Today I quoted  some of the names given at the beginning of John’s Revelation – spoken by the One who is counted worthy to receive the praise of the hosts of heaven and who yet knows us, our deeds and all our circumstances.

Read these wonderful names to yourself again, read aloud and savour the majesty and power which they signify. Then remind yourself.. “It is this person in whom I trust; this one who calls me beloved; this one who has promised to bring me safely home; this one who calls me to serve him while life remains in my body; this one who calls me to trust amidst chaos, pain and darkness.”

When I remember to whom I pray, and of whom I witness, and for whom I live, I bow in adoration and praise, rejoicing to be counted among his people and exalted by the honour of being known by his name. Then, I stand my ground with a renewed confidence and trust with renewed hope that He will indeed do all things well. Glory to him in and through all!

spare me the closed ear…

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Hear, Israel, and be careful to obey so that it may go well with you.. Hear, O Israel: the Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength.. Do what is right and good in the Lord’s sight, so that it may go well with you..

(Deut 6.3,6&18)

Hear, you deaf; look, you blind, and see! Who is blind but my servant, and deaf like the messenger I send? .. You have seen many things, but you pay no attention; your ears are open, but you do not listen.

(Isa 42.18&20)

The Sovereign Lord … wakens me morning by morning, wakens my ear to listen like one being instructed. The Sovereign Lord has opened my ears; I have not been rebellious, I have not turned away.

(Isa 50.4&5)

Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like someone who looks at his face in a mirror and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. But whoever looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom and continues in it – not forgetting what they have heard but doing it – they will be blessed in what they do.

(Jas 1.22-25)

Whoever has ears, let them hear what the Spirit says to the churches…

(Rev 2.7)

When my children were small, distracted and impatient of instruction or parental caution, I would sometimes ask them to listen to me with their eyes as well as their ears… I reckoned that if they were concentrating both eyes on my face, they were a good deal more likely to be concentrating their minds on my words! The faculty of hearing is repeatedly referred to in the bible as of crucial importance in responding to God’s revelation of himself, and always the inference is that unless one responds in obedience, one is not really listening, not hearing properly.

If I claim to be attuned to God’s voice, alert to his instruction, and yet continue to make choices and behave in ways which contradict his will, then I am not actually hearing him at all. I have closed my ears to his voice, and am listening instead to my own desires, or to the cultural voice which speaks more pleasingly. It was this sin into which the people of Israel fell, and were repeatedly warned against by the prophets. All their boasted faithfulness to God was in practice a willed deafness to his call to obedient witness and dependence on him. They paid a very high price for that persistent rebellion, and I need to learn from their story to be humble and aware of the danger of complacent self-assurance.

To have faith in God, is to make no distinction between hearing and obeying, and we are thankful that it is God’s gift which enables us to respond to him in this way. Apart from his grace, we are bound in a deafness which amounts to fatal rebellion against our maker and redeemer.

In Jesus, we see that perfect listening obedience which enabled him to do all that God entrusted to him, to speak God’s words and to proclaim the coming of the kingdom with such power. In Jesus, we see one who heard and trusted, whose unique understanding of God’s will bore fruit for our salvation. He is our constant companion and our good shepherd; he always knows God’s will, and can carry it to completion. We can therefore walk in confidence with him, knowing that he fully hears and understands the Father’s will and we can trust him always, whether we understand or not.

It is the Father’s will and gift that we should hear and obey him in faith; it is our good Shepherd’s voice which comforts us along the way and restores us when we have become weary or gone astray; it is the Spirit who quickens us to listen with our full attention, desiring only to discern God speaking that we might delight him in our obedience.

Heavenly Father, quicken my spirit to concentrate fully on you as you speak to me through your word. Let me hear you clearly, let hearing be obedience, submission, loyal love and trust. Let the likeness of Christ be seen more and more in my readiness to put your words into practice, and give you all the glory in my life.