Monthly Archives: January 2023

Holding my line..

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“.. listen obediently to God, your God, and keep the commandments and regulations written in this book of revelation. Nothing half-hearted here, you must return to God, your God, totally, heart and soul, holding nothing back… And I command you today: Love God, your God. Walk in his ways. Keep his commandments so that you will live, really live, live exuberantly, blessed by God, your God…

“I call heaven and earth to witness against you today: I place before you life and death, blessing and curse. Choose life… And love God, your God, listening obediently to him, firmly embracing him. Oh yes, he is life itself, a long life…

(Deut 30.10,16,19-20)

Do you hear lady wisdom calling?.. right in the city square where the traffic is thickest, she shouts, “You – I’m talking to all of you.. –  I’m telling you how to live well, I’m telling you how to live at your best.. Blessed the man, blessed the woman, who listens to me, awake and ready for me each morning, alert and responsive as I start my day’s work. When you find me, you find life, real life, to say nothing of God’s good pleasure..”

(Pr 8.1,3,6,32-35)

“I am the good shepherd. I know my own sheep and my own sheep know me. … My sheep recognise my voice. I know them, and  they follow me. I give them real and eternal life.

(Jn 10.13&27)

I am a choral singer – that means I sing with lots of other people, not necessarily at the same time or in the same notes.. one of the most important skills we have to develop is to hold our own lines against others when they are doing totally different things from us! It struck me at a recent rehearsal – where not only the other singers but also the orchestra are doing things that clash horribly with my line of music – that this discipline and skill of both finding and then sticking to my own line is a metaphor for the life of a follower of Jesus in a world of hostility to the gospel.

From the very beginning of the story – when Adam and Eve chose to listen to a different voice, singing a different tune – it has been clear that who we listen to will have huge consequences for us and our eternal wellbeing. By listening to, and acting in agreement with, the voice of the serpent, Eve set in train events which are still being played out today. She and Adam knew the voice of God, and chose to listen to another instead.

God has always given his people freedom to listen to other voices, but if we choose to follow their advice, or stop listening for his voice, then we will be heading for trouble. A singer has to listen to all that is going on, but if they are to hold their own line, there will be certain chords and notes which will give them the cues they need and the support to keep going as the composer intended they should! Do I know where to find those cues among the cacophany of other voices which bombard me all the time, suggesting that God cannot be trusted, that Jesus is a myth, that religion is a private thing and not to be talked of, or that it is dangerous and something to be ashamed of?

Followers of Jesus listen for his voice – we turn to the records of his ministry, to the letters of his disciples, to the Hebrew scriptures from which he quoted and where he saw himself foreshadowed. We listen for his voice in scripture, and we listen hard, so that every tone and characteristic becomes dear and instantly recognisable, no matter what else is going on.

Followers of Jesus also listen for each other – just like the others in my particular section of the choir. We hear one another, we depend on one another’s discerning and ability to hold the tune against others – as a group we are so much better and stronger than on our own. In the same way, I am weakened in my faith-listening if I never do it with others, I make myself so much more vulnerable than I need to be!

Almighty God, give your children the will and the discernment to listen out for and fix upon your voice among all that would distract us. Bless us with companions who desire to listen to you, and who will help us to remain faithful to your tune, your rhythm, your composition for this world and your work in it. Help us, if and when we stumble in our line, to realise quickly that we are astray, and to listen with fresh hunger and desire for you, so that we return to your path and glorify you.

For all the saints…

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Children’s children are a crown to the aged, and parents are the pride of their children.

Listen to your father, who gave you life, and do not despise your mother when she is old. Buy the truth and do not sell it; get wisdom, discipline and understanding. The father of a righteous child has great joy; he who has a wise child delights in them. May your father and mother be glad; may she who gave you birth rejoice.

(Prov 17.6 & 23.22-25)

For none of us lives for ourselves alone and none of us dies for ourselves alone. If we live, we live to the Lord; and if we die, we die to the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord.

(Rom 14.7&8)

These were all commended for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised. God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect. Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. 

Endure hardship as discipline.. God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.

(Heb 11.39-12.2 & 12.7,10&11)

Ten years ago this week, my mother died. It will be fifteen years this spring since my father died. Gone, almost as if they had never been. Their house is owned by another, and their belonging largely gone. There are no monuments or trust funds in their names, no awards or philanthropic projects to perpetuate their memory. There are three adult children and four grandchildren – the latter with very patchy memories of the grandparents who died while they were still young.

And yet, I know that because my parents were christians, followers of Jesus, they live. I know that they died in full assurance of their future resurrection, and that one day I will join with them and all the other dear departed saints as we rejoice with the Lamb at the great marriage banquet in glory.

They left family members in whom their genes are perpetuated – traits of character and shared physical attributes. But they also left a legacy of loving service and investment in the kingdom which will only be fully appreciated when the Lord comes to make all things new and to reveal what He is working by his Spirit in and through us.

They left a legacy in our lives, a priceless  model of faithful living. They weren’t perfect, and we saw the struggles from the inside. They faced many challenges, and we saw how at times they were near overwhelmed. BUT we also saw how they lived in dependence on Jesus, the saviour who had won both their hearts in early adulthood, and who remained Lord of their lives through all that followed. They showed us that God’s discipline was worth enduring, and his wisdom worth treasuring more than all that this world can offer us. I was and remain so very proud of my parents, so thankful for their lives and all they taught us. I want to be that kind of parent to my own children, and pray to be a blessing and not a stumbling block to them.

The last gift that both mother and father gave us was the acceptance of God’s timing and manner of dealing with them at the end of their lives. They completely submitted themselves to the Lord, reckoning death as nothing to fear, but something to be preparing for in faith and trust. There was no complaining, no “why me, why now?” And this has left me with a great peace and acceptance in my turn that my Lord knew what he was about – I was not somehow deprived of something I needed by their deaths.

In life, as in facing death, their desire was to glorify their Saviour. It is my prayer that I too might do this, to emulate all those dear saints who have gone before in trust and obedience. My best tribute to my own parents is to follow their example, to live for and die with my Lord. May he give me grace to serve him in this way, for his glory and my blessing. Amen.

It’s never black and white

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In you, O Lord, I have taken refuge; let me never be put to shame. Rescue me and deliver me in your righteousness; turn your ear to me and save me. Be my rock of refuge, to which I can always go; give the command to save me, for you are my rock and my fortress.

For you have been my hope, O Sovereign Lord, my confidence since my youth. From my birth I have relied on you; you brought me forth from my mother’s womb. I will ever praise you… My mouth is filled with your praise, declaring your splendour all day long.

Do not cast me away when I am old, do not forsake me when my strength is gone… Be not far from me, O God; come quickly, O my God, to help me. May my accusers perish in shame; may those who want to harm me be covered with scorn and disgrace.

But as for me, I shall always have hope; I will praise you more and more. My mouth will tell of your righteousness, of your salvation all day long, though I know not its measure… Your righteousness reaches to the skies, O God, you who have done great things. Who, O God, is like you? 

Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up. You will increase my honour and comfort me once again. I will praise you with the harp for your faithfulness, O my God; I will sing praise to you with the lyre, O Holy One of Israel.

My lips will shout for joy when I sing praise to you – I, whom you have redeemed. 

(Ps 71.1-3,5&6,8-10,12-15,19-23)

If we are honest with ourselves, life is always a bit of a mixed bag – never all good and never all bad. It’s as though being human requires a complexity of emotions all the time, and it is sometimes exhausting! As followers of Jesus – who said that in this world we would have trouble – we should never expect to find life easy. As intelligent readers of the bible – full of the consequences of human sin for people and planet alike – we should not be surprised that suffering dogs humanity, that our world doesn’t function as it could, that bad stuff happens and life can be horrible.

No, the question is not, whether we and those we love will face trouble, but rather, what we will do with it when it arises? What does faith look like when all around is distress, uncertainty and weariness?

I find the honesty of the bible stories inexepressibly comforting, as they record the struggles of God’s children down the generations, and I see my own situation mirrored in theirs. It is not black and white – so often the things that we suffer appear to come out of nothing – look at the story of Job, who never found out what lay behind his appalling loss and illnesses, but who is commended in scripture for his faith. While we may occasionally be able to trace a link between trouble now, and past wrongdoing – often relationships will be permanently damaged and continue to malfunction due to our mistakes; we do live with consequences – very often there is no sign of a ‘reason’ for our troubles.

So, faith doesn’t necessarily look like someone who has all the answers and is serenely enduring because they know ‘what it’s for’. Faith can look like someone who is afraid, weak and well aware of their own helplessness, yet who clings stubbornly to the God who died on the cross to express his love for them. Faith is one who continues to pray, ‘thy will, not mine, be done’, and who persists in offloading their doubts and tears into the lap of their heavenly Father – sometimes even entrusting his eternal tender patience with their tantrums of terror and loss.

As I sit with the burdens of many dear friends in these days, burdens of every kind of trouble, this is how I pray for them, for this dogged and determined faith – which God gives to his children as they lean, exhausted and weary, upon him. I pray this for myself in the coming year, with its unknowns, that for the sake of Christ our Lord, we might honour him in all things.

O thou, the reflection of whose transcendent glory did once appear unbroken in the face of Jesus Christ, give me today a heart like his – a brave heart, a true heart, a tender heart, a heart with great room in it , a heart fixed on Thyself; for his name’s sake. Amen.

(John Baillie: A diary of private prayer, 1932)

On the way home

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In that day this song will be sung in the land of Judah: “We have a strong city; he sets up salvation as walls and bulwarks. Open the gates, that the righteous nation that keeps faith may enter in. You keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on you, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord God is an everlasting rock…. The path of the righteous is level; you make level the way of the righteous. In the path of your judgements, O Lord, we wait for you; your name and remembrance are the desire of our soul. My soul yearns for you in the night; my spirit within me earnestly seeks you. For when your judgements are in the earth, the inhabitants of the world learn righteousness.. O Lord, you will ordain peace for us, for you have indeed done for us all our works.

(Isa 26.1-4,7-9 & 12)

I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.

(Jn 16.33)

As a follower of Jesus, I live in an in-between time, a waiting and watching time, and yet a time when my Lord commands my full commitment to living with and for him in the present and place where I am. For over two millenia, Christians have existed with this tension, and still we wait, reading history through the lens of God’s revelation of his ways with humankind, and discerning how as time goes by, the truth of that revelation is underscored again and again. Therefore, we wait in hope, as those who are confident in the fulfillment of their expectations and content to be busy meanwhile about their master’s business. I cannot know when he will return, but I want to be actively working and worshipping when he comes!

The passage in Isaiah is a meditation on what it is like to inhabit this now-and-not-yet state; to be saved and yet still live with temptations; to be on the victor’s side and yet still experience the pain and damage of warfare; to be transformed into God’s beloved children and yet still live in a world and with people who do not know him and with all the devastating consequences of sin. The believer recognises that peace is the gift of God, indeed, all that is needed for our salvation and eternal life is from God’s gracious hand. It is his choice to make us secure in his family and give us an inheritance in the city of salvation which he has made. It is by God’s grace that we are able to keep faith, in spite of sin and failing in this world, to go on desiring his glory and a better, closer, truer relationship with him every day.  

As we choose to live according to his judgements, accepting his definition of right and wrong, living within the boundaries which he lovingly appoints for us, we walk in his paths. As we choose to accept those troubles which he judges permissible, living in a fallen world, under all the consequences of our sins and those of others, accepting them by faith as his decrees and continuing to seek his glory and to obey him, then we walk in his paths. In both those kinds of walking, we are waiting for God to reveal himself through our lives to others – to demonstrate his grace and goodness and love and speak to them.

As I go into another year, with trouble on all sides and many voices clamouring for my attention, I pray that – with Isaiah – I might say the name and renown of the Lord is the desire of my heart, and that I yearn day and night to know and honour him more. I pray that I might trust that the peace which is my portion in Jesus is indeed fully mine – that I might face trials steadily and base my life in God’s promises and the knowledge that he makes my path smooth as I follow in faith where he leads. I am on the way home, to a glory, a love, a family all beyond my wildest dreams; let my heart therefore not be troubled as I walk through  this shadowy realm, waiting on the Lord in my spirit and finding him ever present as my unshakeable rock and salvation.

I have today…

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“Look at the birds, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, careless in the care of God. And you count far more to him than birds. Has anyone by fussing in front of the mirror ever gotten taller by so much as an inch? All this time and money wasted on fashion – do you think it makes that much difference? Instead of looking at the fashions, walk out into the fields and look at the wildflowers…. If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers.. don’t you think he’ll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you?….

Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met. Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.

(Matt 6.26-34, the Message translation)

And now I have a word for you who brashly announce, “Today – at the latest, tomorrow – we’re off to such and such a city for the year. We’re going to start a business and make a lot of money.” You don’t know the first thing about tomorrow. You’re nothing but a wisp of fog, catching a brief bit of sun before disappearing. Instead, make it a habit to say, “If the Master wills it and we’re still alive, we’ll do this or that.”

(Jas 4.13-15, the Message translation)

How convenient it is to just forget that we have nothing guaranteed to us in life. As we look ahead to the days of 2023, we may see plans for holidays, weddings and graduations, for new homes and special activities for which bookings are already made. Or we may be making plans to pursue new interests, change our exercise habits, get involved with new intitiatives in our church and community. All this is perfectly natural, and in one sense quite wise – as creatures, we thrive on anticipation, looking ahead, making and fulfilling plans. In another sense however, it is rather delusional, since we cannot know from day-to-day just what will happen to us. Our lives can change in an instant – accidents, redundancies, bereavements, fractured relationships are all things which we cannot always see coming and prepare for, and the statistics assure us that we are just as likely as anyone else to suffer from all of them. As believers, we are not somehow immune to the weaknesses of our bodies, and the impact of other people’s choices on our lives.

Let me therefore look out to the new year with wisdom, by all means with plans but also with a very profound sense of my own frailty, and ignorance. My courage must rest not in my organisational skills, physical or mental strength, financial resources or even my family, but solely in the God in whom I trust. I cannot know what he may permit in my life in the days to come, but I can choose to turn towards him every day and pray to be joyful in the present, in the day that is given, in the opportunity to serve which is within my reach at this moment.

It is not right that I should live in fear of loss, regretting in advance those things which may not be mine for all my days – how foolish is such an attitude?! Rather, I pray God will give me wisdom to dive into deep gratitude for their continued presence in my life for as long as they are there. I pray to be fully present in the days he gives, not curled up behind closed curtains, mourning in advance because I will not always have them. I pray to rightly thank the giver of all good gifts by appreciating each one to the hilt, and living where he has placed me with all my strength.

Merciful Father, who knows my frame and frailty and has compassion on my weakness, I pray for strength to honour you with today. I pray that I might not squander it in selfishness, but spend it with you in gladness. Light up my thoughts by your love, let me notice every good gift you will prepare for me today, so that in worship and thankfulness if in nothing else, I might spend the day well.

Let not the possibility of change and loss pollute the joy of today, but rather as I thank you, my good Father for all your gifts, let my trust in you grow.  So may I can face change with steadfast heart, knowing you have different, and still good things, to give me in new ways and different places. For your glory, and my blessing, Amen.