Category Archives: Grace

Rich meats!!

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Paul, a servant of Christ Jesus, called to be an apostle, set apart for the gospel of God, which he promised beforehand through his prophets in the Holy Scriptures, concerning his Son, who was descended from David according to the flesh and was declared to be the Son of God in power according to the Spirit of holiness by his resurrection from the dead, Jesus Christ our Lord, through whom we have received grace and apostleship to bring about the obedience of faith for the sake of his name among all the nations, including you who are called to belong to Jesus Christ.

For I am not ashamed of the gospel, for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes, to the Jew first and also to the Greek. For in it the righteousness of God is revealed from faith for faith, as it is written, “The righteous shall live by faith.”

But now the righteousness of God has been manifested apart from the law, although the Law and the Prophets bear witness to it – the righteousness of God through faith in Jesus Christ for all who believe.

For there is no distinction: for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified by his grace as a gift, through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus, whom God put forward as a propitiation by his blood, to be received by faith. This was to show God’s righteousness, because in his divine forbearance he had passed over former sins. It was to show his righteousness at the present time, so that he might be just and the justifier of the one who has faith in Jesus.

(Rom 1.1-6, 16&17:3.21-26)

I firmly believe that one of the most useful things which any church leadership can do for their flock is to teach them not to be afraid to read and learn from every part of the bible. That may sound a bit obvious, but not every congregation of believers has regular teaching from books of prophecy, Old Testament history or law, the wisdom books like Ecclesiastes – and many will not know much beyond the gospels in the New Testament! This can leave us fearful of the reputation of a book which we have never studied – we hear it described as “challenging” and decide to skip it.. thereby missing out on things which God has designed and provided for our blessing as the Spirit works through the word in our minds and hearts.

I have much to be thankful for when I recall the congregations in which I grew up, not least the commitment of the ministers in each one to the systematic exposition of the bible, a deliberate investing of teaching time in every kind of biblical writing, which has set me free from fear arising from ignorance. In particular at this time, I am grateful to James Philip, under whose ministry in Edinburgh I was raised, and who had a great passion for the letter of Paul to the Romans – he preached through it several times over the course of his decades-long ministry. I am so thankful that I can approach a current bible study in Romans with confidence, and anticipation, because I recall Mr Philip’s deep enthusiasm for it as treasure worth mining!

I do not intend – nor am I equipped – to embark on a succinct and helpful summary of that immense, deep, closely reasoned and forensically accurate argument which Paul presents in his letter, I only want to encourage others to get hold of a decent commentary, and start reading and mining its depths for themselves! Yes, Paul can get very intense, and his paragraphs are breathless in their flow of thought, but I love that! I get the feeling of being in the room with the great apostle, hearing the joy and thrill in his voice as he pours out the truth which has transformed his life, and which he sees transforming lives and communities everywhere he goes. Paul, in his former life a highly trained Pharisee, was God’s perfect instrument for this articulate and detailed exposition of the problem of human sin, the place of the law and the old covenant, the promise of salvation, and the glorious reality which is God’s gift of grace – the story of the rescue which humanity so desperately needs, and which must come from the One against whom we have so completely and consistently rebelled.

I know that I could go on revisiting this great text for years and never fully master its arguments and realise the breadth and depth which Paul is revealing to us. And how wonderful is that?! What a treasure to have with us, what satisfying rations for the journey of faith we find in this book..

Heavenly Father, I praise and worship you today for the great and glorious gospel which is revealed to us in Jesus; I rejoice to know myself the object of your grace and to rest by faith in the complete saving work of your appointed sacrificial lamb.

Let the studying of your word nourish and strengthen the faith which you have gifted to me; let me feast on the rich and strong meats which are in Paul’s letter to the Roman church, and be able to say with him, that I am not ashamed of the gospel, but rather exult in it, and exalt the One who revealed and delivered it! In His Name and for His glory I pray, Amen!

Daily grace…. a constant miracle!

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The grace of our Lord Jesus be with you.

(Rom 16.20)

With this in mind, we constantly pray for you, that our God may count you worthy of his calling, and that by his power he may fulfil every good purpose of yours and every act prompted by your faith. We pray this so that the name of our Lord Jesus may be glorified in you, and you in him, according to the grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ.

(2Thess 1.11-12)

The end of all things is near. Therefore, be clear minded and self-controlled so that you can pray. Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins. Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling. Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God’s grace in its various forms…. So that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen.

All of you, clothe yourselves with humility towards one another, because,

”God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.”

Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.

Be self -controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings.

And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast. To him be the power for ever and ever. Amen.

(1 Pet 4.7-11: 5.5-11)

It’s been one of those days, you know, when my good intentions go out the window, and I lose all self-respect as my worst habits and weaknesses take hold – yet again! And when that happens, the accuser of our souls, the enemy of our Lord Jesus, is right at my shoulder and ready to drag me down into all sorts of misery and inward-looking torments… And at this point, even though nothing very bad has happened, and no one else is suffering for my failures, yet still I need to recognise that I am in danger from an enemy, and that I have a choice over what happens next!

Peter exhorts his readers to humble themselves, casting their anxiety upon God in full expectation that His care for them is sufficient to deal with whatever the issues may be. Does this apply in my own private messes too? Indeed, I believe that it does! I have this window, this moment in which to recognise my danger, and to humble myself before God – to admit that I have messed up again, and that I cannot make anything good of my days without God’s aid and strength. AND I admit that I need his transforming Spirit’s work in my heart and mind to continue – so that I learn to be more self-controlled, and able to resist my own weaknesses better next time!

Above all, I remember and cling to grace – because it is there that my hope lies. I can face my own failures, repetitive and pathetic as they are, because God’s grace is sufficient to deal with them over and over again. Indeed, my Saviour delights to exchange his beauty and peace and righteousness for my daily messes – it is his desire to give, and my immeasurable privilege to receive. I exchange guilt for grace; remorseful self-reproach for humble praise and thanksgiving; I turn from myself, to look upon my Saviour, and hope is restored because he remains faithful, ever living to intercede for me and to keep me close to my Father. How marvellous is this daily miracle?! How much we have cause to rejoice as believers in this sustaining flow of hope, peace and love, which we receive in Jesus Christ.

Surely, this has to be part of the reason that almost all the letters included in our New Testament end with the prayer that the readers might know and receive grace? It is as necessary to us every day as is our daily bread, as the air we breathe. Grace not only – as John Newton’s great hymn puts it – “taught my heart to fear, and … my fears relieved”, but it will also “lead me home.” The key to faithful and persevering Christian living, is depending on grace, not on our own graft. Thus we are free every day to serve, to love and live in fellowship with our Lord, and to the praise of his name – just as Paul prayed for the Thessalonian church.

O Father, how good it is to know grace! What freedom you have brought us into as we receive all your riches through Christ, and are delivered from the tyranny of sin and death, to know joy and peace and hope in you.

Let me depend daily upon grace; rejecting the temptation to rest upon my own efforts, and standing firm when the enemy of my soul would tempt me to despair over my failures. Let me stand proudly and resist him, claiming the grace of my Lord Jesus as my protection now and always! In his name I pray this, Amen.

Resting in grace

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Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered. Blessed is the man whose sin the Lord does not count against him and in whose spirit is no deceit.

When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer. Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity. I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord” – and you forgave the guilt of my sin.

Therefore, let everyone who is godly pray to you while you may be found; surely when the mighty waters rise, they will not reach him.

You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance. Rejoice in the Lord and be glad, you righteous; sing, all you who are upright in heart!

(Ps 32 1-7&11)

In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength, but you would have none of it….. Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him!

(Isa 30.15&18)

This is what the Lord says: “Stand at the crossroads and look; ask for the ancient paths, ask where the good way is, and walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.”

(Jer 6.16)

At that time Jesus said, “I praise you, Father, Lord of heaven and earth, because you have hidden these things from the wise and learned, and revealed them to little children…. Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

(Matt 11.28-30)

Did you notice that little phrase, buried in the middle of the words from Isaiah? “Yet the Lord longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion” – there is the sense of a generous host, on the edge of their seat and longing for an opportunity to shower good things upon a welcome guest. But in our case, the host is beyond generous, and we are in many ways the most unlikely of guests! Nonetheless, the bible asserts time and again that the Lord Almighty, Creator of all things, and utterly beyond our imaginations to comprehend in his glory and greatness – THIS God – is so eager to be in a warm and loving relationship with his creatures (us!), that he will go to incredible lengths to remove every possible barrier that stands in the way. In sending Jesus to live, die and rise again for us, the ultimate price was paid and the world saw just what it meant that we should be loved by the Lord of heaven and earth.

As believers in Jesus, we are called to a life marked by repentance AND rest – the two should not be incompatible. David gives a graphic description of what happened when he failed to repent – his rest was destroyed, as he was not only at fault in relation to other people, but crucially, his relationship with God was deeply disturbed. Repentance then, was restoration of rest because it restored his relationship. To be in relationship with God as Father is to be at rest, and because Jesus has opened the way for us to enter in and call upon God as Father, we live at rest even now.

The grace of God – his generous loving forgiveness, transforming power, and his ‘parenting’ of us – is our security and the foundation of our lives. It is like the rock upon which our little habitations stand, and when the storms shake the walls, or even knock them down, yet still we find ourselves upon the rock. Grace will never fail us, because God keeps his promises and in Christ we are absolutely sure of receiving those promises. Therefore, I can say that I rest in grace, I cease to strive or be anxious about finding God’s favour, or earning my eternal home, or about my continued sins. I receive and rest in the goodness of God which has provided for all my needs, and will ensure my safe passage home to glory when the time comes.

Heavenly Father, what a glorious relief it is to know that I can live in the spacious freedom of grace – your abundant goodness to me in your son Jesus. What a joy to live as one who knows that her sin is covered, and her sins are forgiven; who receives daily gifts of love and the assurance that as she repents, there is provision and transformation continues. I thank and praise you today for this season of tranquility, and pray that it might bear fruit in deeper gratitude and trust in you for whatever lies ahead. How amazing is your grace to me in Jesus, in whose name I come, by whom I belong, in whom I rest – to him be all the praise, Amen!

It doesn’t have to be complicated…

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Have some of you noticed that we are not yet perfect? (No great surprise, right?) And are you ready to make the accusation that since people like me, who go through Christ in order to get things right with God, aren’t perfectly virtuous, Christ must be an accessory to sin? The accusation is frivolous. If I was “trying to be good”, I would be rebuilding the same old barn that I tore down. I would be acting as a charlatan.

What actually took place is this: I tried keeping rules and working my head off to please God, and it didn’t work. So I quit being a “law” man so that I could be God’s man. Christ’s life showed me how, and enabled me to do it. I identified myself completely with him. Indeed, I have been crucified with Christ. My ego is no longer central. It is no longer important that I appear righteous before you or have your good opinion, and I am no longer driven to impress God. Christ lives in me. The life you see me living is not “mine”, but is lived by faith in the Son of God, who love me and gave himself for me. I am not going to go back on that.

Is it not clear to you that to go back to that old rule-keeping, peer-pleasing relationship would be an abandonment of everything personal and free in my relationship with God? I refuse to do that, to repudiate God’s grace.

(Gal 2.17-21: the Message)

My minister is currently teaching us from the letter of the apostle Paul to the Galatians, a time of preparation as our congregation enters into a period of disruption, challenge and opportunity through building and renovation works which will – God willing – create a more useful, welcoming, and mission-oriented space for the future. Paul’s overriding concern in this letter is to convince the churches in Galatia that they are in danger of falling into error – the error of depending on something other than or as well as, the saving life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ, and the offer of salvation by faith in him alone. He passionately argues for the grace of God as the sole means by which we receive salvation, demonstrating to the church that to continue to observe the Old Testament laws and practices of Judaism is to say that Jesus is not enough.

The settling of this argument in the early days of the church was crucial in freeing the gospel to reach around the world, making disciples in every nation, and at the same time creating one body unified around faith in Christ. Our shared faith is what unites us, not our dress codes, modes of praise, order of public worship, use of musical instruments, types of seating or church architecture. In every land and in every age, the church needs to be alert to the very real danger of holding onto things which were good and valuable in their time, but are now obstacles to the gospel, keeping people at a distance.

Are there things in our church culture which make faith in Jesus look complicated? Are we talking and living in ways which make Christianity sound like a secret society with its own language? Are we so busy pleasing one another, and maintaining traditions which no longer serve the gospel that we have not noticed the mission field on our doorstep? And are we so besotted with our own ways of doing things that we would rather see our churches close than give them up?

Yes, it is painful to let go of traditions in our church which connect us to those who have gone before. Yes, it feels strange to do things differently, modernising our language and relaxing our dress codes. But think a moment… we as God’s people are called to go and find the lost in his name. Jesus said to his disciples, ‘if you love me, you will keep my commands..’ and then, ‘Go and make disciples’. What does it say about our love for Jesus, when our traditions matter to us more than taking his love to the world for which he died?

Our message, good news about Jesus Christ is not complicated – although it is profound in its implications! We have to share the love of God for his world, love which moved him to do for us what we desperately need, and are unable to do for ourselves. As we stop trying to please God, and instead accept that Jesus has provided the way for us to be with God, we enter the freedom which every human being is born to know.

Heavenly Father, hear our prayer as we confess that we so easily complicate and confuse the gospel with our own ways of doing things, and make it hard for people to see the truth. Simplify our thinking, so that we hold fast to grace, to your faithfulness, to the all-sufficient work of Christ. Help us to recognise and reject all those things which muddle and hold us back from proclaiming the gospel clearly. May we never be the cause of anyone failing to meet Jesus by our insistence on tradition or church culture.

Let us humbly and eagerly look to share Christ with your hurting world, for his glory, and in his name we pray, Amen.

Lost in translation…

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Do you think anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ’s love for us? There is no way! Not trouble, not hard times, not hatred, not hunger, not homelessness, not bullying threats, not backstabbing …. None of this fazes us because Jesus loves us. I’m absolutely convinced that nothing – nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable – absolutely nothing can get between us and God’s love because of the way that Jesus our master has embraced us.

(Rom 8 38-39; the Message)

O my soul, bless God. From head to toe, I’ll bless his holy name! O my soul, bless God, don’t forget a single blessing!…..

God is sheer mercy and grace; not easily angered, he’s rich in love. He doesn’t endlessly nag and scold, nor hold grudges for ever. He doesn’t treat us as our sins deserve, nor pay us back in full for our wrongs. As high as heaven is over the earth, so strong is his love to those who fear him. And as far as sunrise is from sunset, he has separated us from our sins.

As parents feel for their children, God feels for those who fear him. He knows us inside and out, keeps in mind that we’re made of mud. Men and women don’t live very long; like wildflowers they spring up and blossom, but a storm snuffs them out just as quickly, leaving nothing to show they were here. God’s love, though, is ever and always, eternally present to all who fear him …God has set his throne in heaven; he rules over us all. He’s the king!

(Ps 103, extracts; the Message)

A few weeks ago, I woke in the early hours of the morning and found myself unable to get back to sleep. My mind was full of questions, fretting over issues – none of them actually urgent, and all quite reasonable – and getting into a real state of anxiety and self-condemnation as a result. I decided to get up rather than lie and fight with my rebel-thoughts, and as a result, I heard a  blackbird singing in the darkness, singing because he knew the dawn-light was coming.

O Lord, my compassionate Father, I want to be like this bird, confident in your love in spite of the darkness of grief, sin and evil in this world; at peace and able to surrender the illusion that I have control over my life. Let my mind and heart be gripped by your love so that I grow in wisdom and hope, resilience and usefulness. Let me not fail to know your love even when circumstances seem to conspire against it, and when my spirit quails. Lord , you know that it is hard to believe in your personal love when my life hurts and I am filled with fear, or when I see loved ones suffer and walk away from you.

I read and believe in the truth of the gospel, it is my foundation for life and all my hope is in Jesus. Yet I can’t seem to translate the great truth of that love down into my daily struggles, the need for decisions and action, the continual distracting effect of the pressure of other lives upon mine. I have to be present with people, with my own body in its roles and responsibilities – and when I am present, I seem to have forgotten about You; I just can’t hold the big stuff and the small stuff together in my mind, and it is a bit discouraging. 

How does the reality of my Father’s eternal and secure loving grasp on me get translated into life as a sinner among sinners? How does it make a difference? Perhaps simply asking this question on a regular basis is a good thing, because it forces me to recognise my need for God, and my own inability to do what I desire apart from him!

O Lord, have mercy on me and teach me, make it real for me. I need you to make a difference in all my life – in how I live and deal with an ageing body; in how I live within my marriage and family; in how I resolve tension and make decisions (small and large) about all the practical details and patterns of life. The big picture is so beautiful, but Lord, I can’t just sit and look at it all day every day!! By your spirit, please enable me to be ever more conscious of your presence even as I am immersed in the busy-ness of my life.

So be content with who you are.. God’s strong hand is on you.. Live carefree before God; he is most careful with you. 

(1 Pet 5.6&7; the Message)

Thank you Father that you provide for the gritty realities of our lives, and that your grace never fails. Each new day brings us new opportunities to prove your love, receive your grace and grow in trust. Thank you that it isn’t a one-off thing, but a continual process; help me to go on casting my cares on you, make it my constant practice, a liberating discipline which gradually becomes instinctive, so that your loving care for me is the foundation from which I face each day’s messy reality. Let the great gospel truth so completely permeate my thinking that there is no longer a disconnect between my knowledge of your love in Christ, and my attitude to the smallest challenge. Unify all that I am in godly obedience and joyful trust, for Jesus’ sake, Amen

Accepting that I am responsible..

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Don’t hoard treasure down here where it gets eaten by moths and corroded by rust or – worse – stolen by burglars. Stockpile treasure in heaven, where it’s safe from moth and rust and burglars. It’s obvious, isn’t it? The place where your treasure is, is the place you will most want to be, and end up being.

(Matt 6.19-21)

Celebrate God all day, every day. I mean, revel in him! Make it as clear as you can to all you meet that you’re on their side, working with them and not against them. Help them see that the Master is about to arrive. He could show up any minute!

Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the the centre of your life.

Summing it all up, friends. I’d say you’ll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious – the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse. Put into practice what you learned from me, what you heard and saw and realised. Do that, and God, who makes everything work together, will work you into his most excellent harmonies.

(Phil 4.4-9)

Let me start by making one thing quite clear.. I am NOT in any way advocating salvation by works! I believe that saving faith in Jesus Christ as Lord is the only means by which God has ordained that people should come into his family and kingdom. So what do I mean by the acceptance of responsibility?

Well, I was challenged recently by words spoken in a YouTube video by the author and teacher, Beth Moore, who was exhorting us as believers to take responsibility for ourselves. And by this she referred to the daily realities which we face, of choices about how we spend our time, what our priorities are, and whether or not we choose to continually reorientate ourselves towards our heavenly Father. As a beloved daughter of the King of Kings, forgiven and cherished, I can come with shameless boldness into the throne room, a boldness arising out of the security which Christ’s death has won for me. How shameful it would be if I disregarded the sacrifice of Jesus, and hung back as though something more were needed to make me welcome in my Father’s house!

Taking responsibility for myself then means to recognise that I still have a choice every day, and in every situation. Will I melt into a puddle of self-pity, making myself the victim of circumstances? Or will I recognise that as someone made alive in Christ, released from slavery to sin, I have access to the eternal power of God to transform me and to sustain me in every situation? I stand in a direct and intimate relation to this powerful and loving God, and it is to Him alone that I look for aid – not to any friend, spouse, family member or faith leader. What will I choose to do? I pray for courage and faith to stand on my own feet, putting myself over and over again into God’s hands, and affirming my surrender to His will and purposes.

He is my rescuer, and my master and I am called to be his faithful labourer – neither a spectator nor a passive unthinking slave.  As I discipline myself to live intimately with God – through prayer and growing absorption of the truth revealed to us in the bible – then I am responsibly doing what I can do, in order for God to do what only He can! I make it my business to be in the place where I am surrendered to his work, hearing his voice, and allowing nothing to prevent his word from changing my whole being.

Heavenly Father, thank you for reminding me that I am invited by you into a loving relationship, and that as your daughter, I am at home with you always. I pray that your Spirit would work in me to cleanse me from a readiness toward self-pity, towards blaming others and expecting them to fix me!

Help me to recognise that in you, I am offered transforming power, saving love, and eternal hope – and as I learn the daily habits which keep me turning towards and not away from you, this power is at work. Let me be mature in faith, that maturity which recognises how completely dependent I am on you, and chooses to seek and trust you first in every situation.

Thank you for the sufficiency of the saving work of my Lord Jesus, in whose name I pray, Amen.

Set free to accept grace

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And finally, I let myself rest:

Fully,

Heavily,

Weak with relief.

I felt the strength of the encircling arms.

I sensed the steady-beating heart against which I was held.

His breath was warm on my face as He said to me,

“Darling girl, it is enough that you are and that I love you. Be at rest now, and let my love work healing and hope.”

(image: the Prodigal Daughter, Charlie Mackesy: St Ouen’s Parish Church, Jersey)

This image, shared with me at a recent retreat event, is what I want to finish on in 2025. I want to testify to the grace of my loving Father, an abundance of loving acceptance which has – over these past months, and through much pain – finally brought me to a place where I can truly accept His grace, and can fully rest in His love.

Much remains to be learnt, and I continue to be overwhelmed by His patience and gentleness with me, his forgetful child. But, I think that I have finally come home, where I belong, and a major battle is now behind me. I rest in a deeper way than ever before, and I am steadier and less vulnerable to outside influences which might cause me to stumble into despair and fear.

I am SO grateful, for all the ways that my Father has brought me to this place – through scripture, through wise counsel, through reading, and listening to sermons (one dating back over 100 years!). So many different prompts and aids, and all orchestrated by the Spirit to bring me here, where truth which I have known all my life has finally become lived and not merely learnt. Such transformation comes only by God’s power, and I am so thankful for this answer to the prayer of my despair.

It is my prayer for all my brothers and sisters in faith, and even more for all God’s children who still do not know how much they are loved and longed for, who are searching in so many other places for the peace which is found only in His arms; my prayer is that we might know this peace, the foundation of life itself, and of greater worth than anything this world can offer.

In you, Lord my God, I put my trust…. No one who hopes in you will ever be put to shame…. Guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Saviour and my hope is in you all day long.

(Ps 25, extract)

Daring to believe….

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Therefore, since we have a great high priest who has gone through the heavens, Jesus the son of God, let us hold firmly to the faith we profess. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathise with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are – yet was without sin. 

Let us then approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.

(Heb 4.14-16)

..he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us. As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him…

(Ps 103.10-13)

IF we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

(1 Jn 1.8&9)

Now if we died with Christ, we believe that we will also live with him…The death he died, he died to sin once for all; but the life he lives, he lives to God. In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus. Therefore do not let sin reign in your mortal body.. For sin shall not be your master, because you are not under law, but under grace!

(Rom 6.8,10-12&14)

I wrote last week of how a long-standing confusion and trouble in my thinking was being gently removed as God revealed what I have long misunderstood.. perhaps you wondered what that was?! Well, I have long been bewildered by what I – as a mature, well-taught christian woman should think about the fact that I still sin. What should my attitude be? Do I beat myself up for my shortcomings? It has been all-too-often the case that the devil has used awareness of sin as a means to entrap and bind me in self-pity and despair – which then made me feel even worse as that was not godly!!

Anyway, what I want to write about today, and perhaps more in coming weeks, is what God in his mercy and gentle compassion has shown me to be true, and to share something of the transformation which that is bringing. I want to glorify and praise the God who touches his children just where they need healing, and to encourage any reader who might be similarly struggling, not to lose heart..

As a believer, I am new-made and as dead to the power of sin and death as Jesus is in his glory at God’s right hand. The authority of sin over me is broken, and it no longer masters my heart or mind, nor defines my being. I share the life of God, since the Holy Spirit dwells within me; I am learning to recognise sin and to name and view it as God does (this is what confession means) – a blight upon his good creation. As God’s beloved child, my problems are his problems – and everything that troubles me is his business, as every loving parent knows!

The sin which remains active in the life of the believer is not part of their born-again self. It is tied up with the mortal body, which one day will be put off and transformed into a perfect and sinless one. It is removed from the core of our being, detached from our essential new self as Christ-followers. We are now on God’s side against it, and the glorious news is that in Jesus, sin IS already conquered – both past and also future sins which his children may commit before they die. So I am simply being invited to access all the rich resources of Christ in dealing with a problem which is NO LONGER an issue for God. This has been a critical point for me to grasp, and how gloriously, joyously liberating it is to realise that my Father delights to show forgiveness to me for as long as I live.

 Beloved Heavenly Father, how glorious it is to know that I am the object of your love and compassion even as I depend upon your abundant provision over and over again. Thank you that you have shown me that you are not reluctant to pour out all and more than I can ever need, since this is exactly what Jesus died and rose again to make possible! I am now and forever united with you, and the sin that remains is your business to deal with – the more often I come to you for aid, the better pleased you are! Thank you, and all my praise is yours for such grace in Jesus my Lord, Amen.

Since these things are true…

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The Lord is my strength and my defence; he has become my salvation. He is my God, and I will praise him, my father’s God, and I will exalt him.

(Ex 15.2)

Truly I am your servant, Lord; I serve you just as my mother did; you have freed me from my chains. I will sacrifice a thank offering to you and call on the name of the Lord.

(Ps 116.16&17)

Praise the Lord, all you nations; extol him, all you peoples. For great is his love toward us, and the faithfulness of the Lord endures for ever.

(Ps 117)

Formerly, when you did not know God, you were slaves to those who by nature are not gods. But now that you know God – or rather are known by God – how is it that you are turning back to those weak and miserable forces? Do you wish to be enslaved by them all over again?… It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.

(Gal 4.8&9; 5.1)

I have recently been led to think a great deal about the great theme of Exodus which runs through our whole biblical story – of being led out (of slavery)… led through (the wilderness)… and led into(the promised inheritance). The folk at the wonderful Bible Project have released a video exploring this theme, and also the conversations which informed that video, and I cannot recommend them highly enough. 

The whole point of the Exodus narrative in its original context is that there was nothing that the people of Israel could do to make it happen – everything was God’s initiative, the Almighty power-at-work, and it was ultimately all so that every nation under the sun might be blessed in knowing and glorifying God, the great deliverer. You may recall that Jesus, during his conversation with Moses and Elijah on the Mount of Transfiguration is talking about his ‘exodus, which he was to accomplish at Jerusalem'[Lk 9.31]. The image of divine love responding to the oppression of his children by the enemy of God, coming down in power to meet them in their need, and to do for them what they could not do for themselves, should ring so many bells in our minds as believers! 

Our slavery was not to some human power, but something much worse – sin and death – but our God is greater than these, and the death and resurrection of Jesus marked a once-for-all-time victory. The great oppressor no longer holds sway, and nor do the lesser oppressors which the enemy of our souls loves to use, rendering us inactive in God’s service, keeping us fearful, timid, or hopeless. The gospel is our deliverance from slavery, and we have already received the Spirit as guarantee of our inheritance which is to live hereafter in the near presence of God. We are called to live in the place of rest which is accepting God’s inexplicable (apart from grace) acceptance of us as his children.

Heavenly Father, Almighty and Everlasting God, I praise you today for your great lovingkindness and faithfulness. There is no end to your goodness, and you are utterly trustworthy. I am no longer a slave to sin; the power of death over me has been broken. Thank you that today I live in your love, and that your Spirit is within me to direct all that I do and say and think according to your will. 

Thank you that you have given, and are giving my soul rest – a spacious place of blessing. Let me dwell in that place and cease my anxious questings. You have won the victory for me, over all that would enslave, disable and discourage me – let me live in the reality of that triumphant rest for you, my Lord, have been and always are good to me.

Let me truly accept my own condition, neither wallowing despairingly nor deceiving myself into a false conceit. I am, as all believers are, a sinner who has fallen short; and a redeemed, born-again child of God. No more, no less.

I am no less a recipient of your grace than any other believer; I am no less susceptible to your power of transformation; I am the object of your persevering love and the apple of your eye. O Lord, lead me into the rest which is my inheritance as your child. Deliver me from vain striving to prove myself worthy of that adoption, from the pride which detests failure and short-comings, from the foolishness which expects more from myself than you, my Maker and Redeemer, expect. In the name of my mighty and marvellous Saviour, Jesus Christ your Son I pray, Amen.

Who(se) am I?

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“Who am I?  They often tell me
I stepped from my cell’s confinement
Calmly, cheerfully, firmly,
Like a Squire from his country house.

Who am I? They often tell me
I used to speak to my warders
freely and friendly and clearly,
as though it were mine to command.

Who am I? They also tell me
I bore the days of misfortune
equably, smilingly, proudly,
like one accustomed to win.

Am I then really that which other men tell of?
Or am I only what I myself know of myself?
Restless and longing and sick, like a bird in a cage,
Struggling for breath, as though hands were compressing
My throat, yearning for colours, for flowers, for the voices of birds,
thirsting for words of kindness, for neighbourliness,
tossing in expectation of great events,
powerlessly trembling for friends at an infinite distance,
weary and empty at praying, at thinking, at making,
faint, and ready to say farewell to it all.

Who am I? This or the Other?
Am I one person today and tomorrow another?
Am I both at once? A hypocrite before others,
And before myself a contemptible, woebegone weakling?
Or is something within me like a beaten army
Fleeing in disorder from victory already achieved?

Who am I? They mock me, these lonely questions of mine,
Whoever I am, Thou Knowest, O God, I am thine.”

Dietriech Bonhoeffer (4/02/1906 – 9/04/1945)

I recently came upon a recording of this poem, read by the actor Tom Hanks, in recognition of the 80th anniversary of the death of its author, Dietrich Bonhoeffer, under the German Nazi regime, just months before the end of the war. The poem was written while Bonhoeffer was in prison from April 1943 until the end of his life, some two years later. (This link might help you find that recording for yourself https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kBATNRYIBdc)

Now I have known nothing like the crushing grief, oppression and disempowerment which Bonhoeffer experienced in those last months and years – it is impossible to fully imagine such suffering. But perhaps, like me, you can identify with the profound sense of disconnect which he describes – between his public and private persona – and also the deep and agonised questioning of his true identity.. who am I, if I can behave so very differently at one moment from the next? 

I believe that God is the source of our identity – it is in His naming, shaping, saving and transforming that we find significance and value, and meaning. Before anything else, I am the beloved daughter of the Almighty, redeemed by my Saviour’s blood and therefore eternally precious and secure. With these truths, I am armoured against the assault of the enemy of my soul who would drive me down endless arid roads in quest of ‘my identity’, and I believe that without these truths, humanity is astray without a guide, vulnerable to every fad, philosophy, and addiction. Only my security as one who is known and kept by God, can keep me from losing everything in the attempt to find myself! I don’t need to prove anything, but rather receive the abundant grace of my loving Father and rest in his gift.

And that is why these words of a man of deep faith, profound intelligence and eloquence are so moving to me. In the end, after all is stripped from me – health, freedom, family, achievements – who am I? What is true about me; where can I find rest, when tossed between apparently contradictory behaviours and opinions? 

I find rest in God alone. I rest not in who I am, but in who He is – the Almighty who loved me enough to send his Son to die for me. No matter how deeply conflicted I am, this remains true – Christ died for me, and his death and resurrection are sufficient to bring me home to glory.

Can you sense the relief? Does the weight not lift from your heart? We don’t need to answer all the questions, don’t need to have it all understood and neatly organised – we are beloved, and our path lies in sovereign hands which cannot fail to deliver us to glory.

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust. (Ps 91.1&2)

I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning… O Israel, put your hope in the Lord, for with the Lord is unfailing love and with him is full redemption. (Ps 130.5-7)

(*photo of “Joan”, sculpted by Benno Schotz, 1891-1984, in the Perth Art Gallery)