Category Archives: confidence in God

To hear is to obey…

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Listen diligently to me, and eat what is good, and delight yourselves in rich food. Incline your ear, and come to me; hear, that your soul may live..

(Isa 55.2&3)

My son, if you accept my words and store up my commands within you, turning your ear to wisdom and applying your heart to understanding.. then you will understand the fear of the Lord and find the knowledge of God.

(Prov 2.1,2&5)

As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said…. [the Lord answered] few things are needed – or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better and it will not be taken away from her.

(Lk 10.38,39&42)

Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like someone who looks at his face in a mirror and after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. But whoever looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues in it – not forgetting what they have heard, but doing it – they will be blessed in what they do.

(Jas 1.22-25)

I think we can all sometimes have ‘hearing’ problems when it comes to our relationships, particularly with God but also with one another. How often have I been guilty of distracted listening, of paying little real attention to the person speaking to me? And the result is that I misunderstand them, often hurting them as it becomes clear by my inappropriate responses that I have not cared enough about them to really listen and absorb their words. Arrangements get messed up, feelings are hurt, and a whole heap of unnecessary trouble arises, when I fail to listen. Our sense of hearing can only really function properly when our minds are also engaged, to process and act upon what we hear.

In the Hebrew Scriptures, the word used for ‘hearing’ implies an obedient active response. If nothing is done in response, in or by the listener, then they weren’t actually listening at all! As a follower of Jesus, I am called to listen for his voice, not only because He wants me to know him, but also because without listening – really hearing with all that implies about willingness to respond – I cannot know what He would have me be and do as his disciple.

As I listen, I put aside my own assumptions about God’s character and purposes for his kingdom, and I choose to be open to being wrong about all sorts of things! I put aside the wisdom of the world around me, and I choose to learn the truth of God. I choose to remember that I am dust, and that God’s ways are far above my comprehension – that not to understand is no reason to disobey the Almighty, if I truly trust him…

There are many good things which could be done in the name of Jesus, but unless I prioritise listening in humility and expectation, then I may end up very busy with a whole lot of things that are not my calling.. I trust that God will lead and enable me for the work I am to do, and that labour will always be founded in obedience to the word which I hear. There will be a continual rhythm of attentive, critically self-aware listening, which naturally bears fruit in a life of sacrificial love and delight in the One whose voice we are tuned to above all others.

Heavenly Father, let me, like Mary, choose to sit at my Lord’s feet as his disciple. Give me the hunger to hear his words, and the humility which keeps me from thinking I already know it all. Let me remember that busyness is not equal to holiness; that I do not earn your favour by working for it; that all I can ever do is respond in thankful service to your abundant and unfathomable grace to me.

Let me live then in this rhythm of listening first; of making time to read and ponder your word, and trusting that you will lead and enable me then to live for and with you. Speak, O Lord, and let me truly hear and obey your voice – for your glory and the blessing of many in the kingdom, in Jesus’ name, Amen.

It’s all a bit.. overwhelming!!

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“Here is my servant, whom I uphold, my chosen one in whom I delight; I will put my Spirit on him and he will bring justice to the nations. He will not shout or cry out, or raise his voice in the streets. A bruised reed he will not break, and a smouldering wick he will not snuff out. In faithfulness he will bring forth justice; he will not falter or be discouraged till he establishes justice on earth. In his law the islands will put their hope.”

(Isa 42.1-4)

“Turn to me and be saved, all you ends of the earth; for I am God, and there is no other. By myself I have sworn, my mouth has uttered in all integrity a word that will not be revoked: before me every knee will bow; by me every tongue will swear. They will say of me, ‘In the Lord alone are righteousness and strength.'”…. in the Lord all the descendants of Israel will be found righteous and will exult.

(Isa 45.22-25)

He said to them, “This is what I told you while I was still with you: Everything must be fulfilled that is written about me in the Law of Moses, the Prophets and the Psalms.” Then he opened their minds so they could understand the scriptures. He told them, “This is what is written: the Christ will suffer and rise from the dead on the third day, and repentance and forgiveness of sins will be preached in his name to all nations, beginning at Jerusalem. You are witnesses of these things.”

(Lk 23.44-48)

Embrace the “covenant of vocation” or, rather, be embraced by it as the Creator calls you to a genuine humanness at last, calls and equips you to bear and reflect his image.

Celebrate the revolution that happened once for all when the power of love overcame the love of power. And, in the power of that same love, join in the revolution here and now.

(NT Wright; p 416,The Day the Revolution Began – 2016, SPCK, )

I have just finished reading this book – not that I have done much more than look at the words… my concentration is not good these days, and theology  can be quite challenging. But…. I am so grateful that I persevered, because even though I failed to grasp much of the argument, yet I retain a flavour of the triumphant story which it tells. The author’s skill and expertise in this masterful exposition of the meaning of Jesus’ crucifixion has been so helpful, stretching my understanding and I thank God for the gifts which have been put to such glorious use for the building up of the kingdom.

I have glimpsed the greatness of the salvation narrative, been blinded by its light and complexity and yet also compelled by the love which it reveals.  While striving to grasp the theology with my mind, my heart has burned with awe and delight, humbly accepting the truth revealed. It is so much more, so much greater and more glorious than we can begin to imagine, and all part of the great purpose of God since before time began… that we might dwell with and delight in one another, sharing as Creator and beloved creatures in the joy for which we are designed.

I have a sense of so many threads gathering together to create a rich tapestry, like a great carpet unfolding ahead of me as I stumble and endeavour to follow, however lamely, in the way of peace, the way of holiness, the vocation to which I am called and now – by Christ’s triumph – am free to fully live! I am relishing the truth revealed, the fresh understanding of where we are going and why the gospel matters for today as well as for tomorrow.  A fresh vision of mission is revealed – to declare here and now that the world is no longer in bondage, that Jesus has defeated those powers that bind humanity in misery, that true freedom is in him and free to all who will come! The great revolution was launched on Good Friday, and as Jesus’ followers, we are commissioned to spread the word of radical change, the word of hope, that because of him, it is possible to be fully human at last!

As the great revolution is being worked out across the world – in God’s word at work and in our experience of him through the sacraments – may we his people be drawn to worship afresh by the magnitude of His plan, the depth of His love, the steadfastness of His purpose which is being fulfilled hour by hour and heart by heart.

Lord, for the years…

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Lord, for the years your love has kept and guided, urged and inspired us, cheered us on our way, sought us and saved us, pardoned and provided, Lord of the years, we bring our thanks today.

Lord, for ourselves, in living power remake us – self on the cross and Christ upon the throne, past put behind us, for the future take us, Lord of our lives, to live for Christ alone,

(T. Dudley Smith, 1926- )

Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. for,

“Whoever would love life and see good days must keep their tongue from evil and their lips from deceitful speech. They must turn from evil and do good; they must seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayer, but the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”..

..in your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behaviour in Christ may be ashamed of their slander…

(1Pet.3.8-16)

“.. to live for Christ alone..” a motivation for marriage, a purpose for our lives both as individuals and as husband and wife. I believe that when I was called into marriage, it was so that in that context, I might live for my Lord. He had and has work for me to do as a wife, and as a mother – and now a grandmother. Those things are not distractions from my calling as a believer. For me, they are my calling! I have rejoiced to live my life of faith in those places, and could not have fulfilled those tasks without the constant presence and enabling, the love and strength of my Father in heaven.

The journey is not over yet, but as the years pass, the tasks change, and I need fresh anointing of grace, wisdom and strength for the new situations where I serve. As I contemplate another anniversary, I want to give thanks for the years down which – as the opening line of the quoted hymn says – my Lord has kept and guided me. There remain mysteries, unanswered questions about why certain things have happened – or not happened – but my overwhelming sense is of being cared for, provided for, and always conscious of my heavenly Father’s sustaining love.

I give thanks for other marriages which inspire me to persevere in faith; to continue looking for new ways in which to serve my Saviour in the places to which he has brought me. I give thanks for the wisdom of those who have gone before, walking by faith and modelling that gracious dependence on God which teaches me how to live now. I give thanks for those who have let me see that their marriages are not perfect, and yet who know that within that context, they are called to serve one another and to love their Saviour and serve their communities. Yes, there may be a few ideal marriages out there, but most of us are sinners, married to sinners, trying our best to grow in love, forgiveness and patience – and so grateful to God for enabling us to keep going.

We made promises, all those years ago, trusting that God would help us to keep them. And as I consider the years, I see how each fresh resolution to keep on trying, keep on forgiving, keep on asking for forgiveness, has been part of the perseverance which I am called to. I didn’t know when I made those promises, just what the years would bring, but I knew something of the God whom I was trusting to bring me through them. Day-by-day and week-by-week, as I kept walking in obedience, he has walked me down the years, and now there is only a heart full of gratitude for all that he has done – often in spite of me – through this married life.

Thank you, Father, for your faithfulness to us down the years. May we not now neglect the fresh opportunities that you have given us to love and serve you in this new chapter of our lives. Let our lives as husband and wife prove a means of blessing to one another and also to your church and the wider community. May we live for you, in harmonious and fruitful companionship, ever thankful for your presence with us, through Jesus our Lord, Amen.

Dreams and visions…

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“In the last days, God says, I will pour out my Spirit on all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy, your young men will see visions, your old men will dream dreams. Even on my servants, both men and women, I will pour out my spirit in those days and they will prophesy… And everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.”

Fellow Israelites, listen to this: Jesus of Nazareth was a man accredited by God to you by miracles.. which God did among you through him.. This man was handed over to you by God’s deliberate plan and foreknowledge; and you, with the help of wicked men, put him to death by nailing him to the cross. But God raised him from the dead, freeing him from the agony of death, because it was impossible for death to keep its hold on him… Exalted to the right hand of God, he has received from the Father the promised Holy Spirit and has poured out what you now see and hear…. Repent and be baptised, every one of you, in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. And you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.

(Ac 2.17&18,22-24,33&38)

And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession – to the praise of his glory.

(Eph 1.13&14)

I have never personally experienced any of the more dramatic gifts of the Holy Spirit, no prophetic words, or dreams, nothing out of the ordinary. I do nonetheless believe that as a follower of Jesus, I am indwelt by the Spirit; I believe that God himself is the source of my life and is transforming me into the image of his Son. I believe that as I walk by faith down the years that God gives me, I am learning to think, to love and to live more and more according to God’s will – because He is making me new by the work of his Spirit. 

God works through each of his children, their gifts and strengths just as much as their weakness and failures – which is a great comfort. It means that I can rely on the Spirit to direct me in serving and living for God in the place to which I have been called. At the moment, that service primarily looks like making a home, and getting to know a large congregation of people. But I am praying that over time, through daily duties and apparently random encounters, God will be directing me and leading me into the particular tasks which are already prepared. 

I don’t have an agenda; I don’t know what is right yet and many things are good! So I pray for wisdom to discern over time just where to commit time and energy. And yet, there are ideas lurking in my mind which I can’t shake off, and which I am accordingly bringing before God in prayer, asking if these are of his sending.. 

I see in my mind’s eye a packed church, with hundreds of young people praising and rejoicing in their Saviour, committing to serve their God and their community in love and faithfulness… a dream, yes. But also a reminder that God can do anything when He releases people from their bondage to sin and death. I believe that, I long to see it in this place…

And I long to share with other believers from across the town in praying for our community and all the various forms of witness to Jesus which happen within it. When God’s people gather to pray, beautiful things happen – mutual encouragement, strengthened faith, new boldness and expectation that God will break through in transforming power.

Lord God, my loving Father, thank you that I can trust you to glorify your name as I surrender to your will and serve you as best I can. Thank you that you are at work transforming my mind and heart, and for these desires which you have given me – to see our young people, and our whole community reached with the good news. Lord, lead me according to your will, to those with whom I can pray.

Pour out your Spirit in this place and bring transforming power to the lives of those around us. The living death which is exile from you and bondage to sin, cannot resist you since Jesus has broken its power, and how we long to see his victory realised in each and every individual! Your kingdom come, your will be done, in this place as it is in the heavenly realms..

in Jesus’ powerful and glorious name I pray, Amen.

 

If.. such a big little word

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While Jesus was in one of the towns, a man came along who was covered with leprosy. When he saw Jesus, he fell with his face to the ground and begged him, “Lord, if you are willing, you can make me clean.” Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. “I am willing he said. “Be clean!” And immediately the leprosy left him.

(Lk 5.12&13)

Jesus went out as usual to the Mount of Olives, and his disciples followed him. On reaching the place, he said to them, “Pray that you will not fall into temptation.” He withdrew about a stone’s throw beyond them, knelt down, and prayed. “Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done.”

(Lk 22.39-42)

Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money.” Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”

(Jas 4.13-15)

I wonder if you, like me, can identify with the leper in his words to Jesus – “IF you are willing..”? I share the leper’s conviction that Jesus has power to save, to deliver from disease and death. I also share his awareness that it is not for us to dictate to the Sovereign King of all kings, the Ruler of God’s kingdom, the precise ways in which He should exercise that power. It is not for us to grasp every pixel in the big picture, to hold together all the threads of history as it is woven through the lives of millions, across countless thousands of years. We cannot know in detail at any one time just exactly what is best – either for ourselves, our loved ones, or our nation.

If.. is such a little word, but it holds all the dreary and debilitating power of doubt to hold us back from trusting God with all our desires, hopes and fears. We know that down the centuries, God’s children have prayed for peace and had to endure war; they have prayed for rain, and had to watch their children die due to drought; they have prayed for godly leaders, and had to endure persecution, and the authoritarian exercise of power explicitly denying God’s existence. We know from our own experience that faith in Jesus Christ as Lord of Lords and King of Kings does not give us all that we pray for, and we wrestle with disappointment, unanswered questions, crippling grief.

Is God not willing then? Have we misunderstood? I don’t think there are any straightforward responses to this little word, and the massive challenges it raises. But what do we see when Jesus used it? We see an agonised but complete submission to God’s will; a determination to surrender himself to the Love which planned the overturning of human bondage to sin and death, in spite of the price which he would personally pay.

We are called to live as those acutely aware of the frailty of life; of the uncertainty which shrouds our lives even only 24 hours ahead. God asks us to take our hands off the controls (since being ‘in control’ is an illusion in any case), and to let Him be in charge of the world and our lives. We may not always know what God might do in a particular situation – even as the leper was unsure when Jesus came to him that day – but we can always pray for God’s will to be done. We can pray with thanksgiving that in every situation, we have Christ with us and for him to be working in those situations for his glory and our blessing. We can pray for Jesus name to be honoured and for his kingdom to come, heart-by-heart, home-by-home, in our world. We can pray for the Spirit within to motivate and enable us to witness to others by word and deed. We can pray for one another as believers, that we might persevere and grow in our faith, hope and love. We can pray for those who do not believe, that they will repent and return to God before it is too late – since we know that God longs for all his children to know him..

Beloved, let us pray and not lose heart, but, confessing our doubts, bring all our burdens to God, and commit ourselves to submission to his will and obedience to his word. Let unanswered prayer, and especially what look like ‘failed’ prayers bring us quickly to God’s throne in renewed dependence, so that the devil may not render us helpless in despair. Let us pray…

For all the saints…

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For all the saints, who from their labours rest, who Thee by faith before the world confessed; Thy name, O Jesus, be forever blest. Alleluia, Alleluia!

Thou wast their Rock, their Fortress and their Might; Thou, Lord, their Captain in the well-fought fight; Thou, in the darkness drear, their one true Light. Alleluia, Alleluia!

(W.W. How, 1864)

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith.

(Heb 12.1&2)

It is good to remember, to give thanks, and to reflect on the blessings of my heritage of faith. This week marked 16 years since father’s death at the age of 69. He died at home, after several years of dealing with cancer, and in that time he taught us so much about submission to God’s will, and contentment in God’s timing and providence. In his acceptance of the illness, he found peace and even joy, and became eager to depart and be with his Lord. My father did not rage against his dying, but graciously and humbly embraced the path marked out for him by God, and never showed any resentment. We were therefore also able release him into our Lord’s hand and keeping,  trusting our heavenly Father to care for us as we said farewell to our human father. I am profoundly thankful that his memory is not a painful thing, but a sweet and joyous thing, bringing tears only when particular joys come to me that I know he would have shared. What a wonderful gift, to be able to remember with gladness and also to know that our parting is only for a time…

He was a father, a faithful son, brother, husband and friend to many, much beloved. He was loyal above all to  the saviour to whom he gave his life as a very young man, and to whose service all his life was devoted. He was a deeply  contented man, finding joy in growing things, in light and colour, in the beauty of creation, and in his family and friendships – one who valued the gifts of God, but loved the Giver most of all.

My father was not perfect, but he was persevering in his faith, and thus his memory is a great and continual source of glad encouragement to me, because I too am not perfect, but by God’s help I am persevering! My father was beloved of God, he trusted in Jesus for salvation and lived to honour Christ – he was a saint in the proper sense of the word. He wasn’t a special class of Christian (there is no such thing as a hierarchy of believers), nor one to whom we should pray (as if Christ were not listening to us, or unwilling to answer our prayers), but he was a saint – one whom God has declared (through Jesus) to be right with him, one chosen and precious and eternally saved. I give thanks for and am proud to be numbered alongside him. The saints of previous generations are examples to us of faithfulness; they testified to God’s goodness and saving power; they modelled godliness and perseverance. From them we learn that although God may not deal with our challenges in the same way as theirs, He is yet a good and faithful God who can and will act for and through us. His promises can be trusted, and our perseverance is possible!

It is, I think, a good ambition for me: to emulate this man in his godliness, contentment and perseverance of faith. I too would be remembered as one who loved Jesus, and showed love and gentleness, generosity and warmth to all who come my way. I would honour my earthly father, by honouring our heavenly Father until the day dawns when we are reunited in his presence and forever share that joy of divine life without shade of guilt, pain or sorrow.

Ordinary people, with an extraordinary God!

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Then one of them said, “I will surely return to you about this time next year, and Sarah your wife will have a son.” Now Sarah was listening at the entrance to the tent… Sarah laughed to herself as she thought, “After I am worn out and my lord is old, will I now have this pleasure?” Then the Lord said to Abraham, “Why did Sarah laugh and say, ‘Will I really have a child, now that I am old?’ Is anything too hard for the Lord?”

(Gen 18.10-14)

The word of the Lord came to me, saying, “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.” “Alas, Sovereign Lord”, I said, “I do not know how to speak, I am too young.” But the Lord said to me, “Do not say, ‘I am too young’. You must go to everyone I send you to and say whatever I command you. Do not be afraid.. for I am with you.”

(Jer 1.4-7)

The words of Amos, one of the shepherds of Tekoa.. He said “The Lord roars from Zion and thunders from Jerusalem;”

(Am 1.1&2)

In the time of Herod king of Judea there was a priest named Zechariah.. his wife Elizabeth was also a descendant of Aaron. Both of them were righteous in the sight of God…. and they were both very old. Once when Zechariah’s division was on duty and he was serving as priest before God, he was chosen by lot, according to the custom of the priesthood, to go into the temple of the Lord and burn incense… Then an angel of the Lord appeared to him.. “Do not be afraid Zechariah, your prayer has been heard. Your wife Elizabeth will bear you a son, and you are to call him John. He will be a joy and delight to you.. He will bring back many of the people of Israel to the Lord their God”

(Lk 1.5-11,13&16)

“I am the Lord’s servant,” Mary answered. “May your word to me be fulfilled”….. Elizabeth exclaimed.. “Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her!”

(Lk 1.38&45)

‘I’m only..’; ‘I couldn’t….’; ‘what use would I be?’ Perhaps you can identify with these phrases, perhaps like me, they spring often to your lips or mind? Today, I stood with others to watch athletes taking part in a 10km race, full of admiration for the strength and stamina on display, and well aware that I can’t do that. I read or hear of people who are incredibly creative, producing works of art, or wonderful crafts, and my own abilities become insignificant by comparison. I am not particularly clever or witty; I am unable to sustain a reasoned argument in theology or anything else; I am illogical and sentimental; I am almost allergic to adrenaline except in a very few circumstances and thus avoid risk at all costs! What use can I be to God?!

How encouraging then to be reminded, in the words of scholar NT Wright, that

“God regularly works through ordinary people, doing what they normally do, who with a mixture of half-faith and devotion are holding themselves ready for whatever God has in mind.” (Luke for Everyone; SPCK, London;2001)

Sarah thought she was too old; Jeremiah thought he was too young; Amos was a shepherd, not a trained theologian or speaker; Zechariah and Elizabeth also felt rather past it for child-rearing; and Mary, the mother-to-be, wasn’t even married! Each one was met by God, met with strength and enabling as they stepped forward into God’s calling on their lives. Each one found that the God who had called all things into being, whose cosmic plans for salvation and transformation reached across the centuries, yet knew their hearts, their fears and doubts, and said ‘Is anything too hard for me?’

In their, and our weakness, God’s strength and wisdom are displayed. In their, and our obedience (however doubting and hesitant), God’s purposes are fulfilled both for us personally and for his greater glory. Our God has not changed; and thus we may expect that as we make ourselves available – just as Mary did (although possibly more in the incredulous spirit of Sarah or Zechariah!) – so our God will glorify himself and bless us as we persevere in dogged, dutiful, devotion.

Heavenly Father, thank you that so many times you have worked through the small people, the insignificant people, unseen by the world because they are just ‘ordinary’. Thank you, that you are the Extraordinary God, whose power is seen so fully when we surrender ourselves to your bidding, and choose to make your will our delight. Thank you for the empowering of your Spirit within, which makes us able and willing to live for you in this way. Let awareness of my own weakness never stand in the way of obedience to your call, but let me say, like Mary, “May your word to me be fulfilled.” For Jesus sake, Amen.

 

 

Resting in His care..

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Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation? Tell me, if you understand. Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know!.. who laid its cornerstone while the morning stars sang together and all the angels shouted for joy?

Have you ever given orders to the morning, or shown the dawn its place, that it might take the earth by the edges and shake the wicked out of it?

Have you journeyed to the springs of the sea or walked in the recesses of the deep? Have the gates of death been shown to you? Have you seen the gates of the deepest darkness?

Does the rain have a father? Who fathers the drops of dew? From whose womb comes the ice?

Can you raise your voice to the clouds and cover yourself with a flood of water? Do you send the lightning bolts on their way? Do they report to you, ‘Here we are’? …. Who has the wisdom to count the clouds? Who can tip over the water jar of the heavens?

(Job 38.4-7,12-13,16-17,28-29,34-35, 37)

Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! You have set your glory in the heavens. Through the praise of children and infants you have established a stronghold against your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger.

When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars, which you have set in place, what is mankind that you are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them?

You have made them a little lower than the angels and crowned them with glory and honour. You made them rulers over the works of your hands; you put everything under their feet: all flocks and herds, and the animals of the wild, the birds in the sky, and the fish in the sea, all that swim the paths of the seas.

Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!

(Ps 8)

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are!.. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him.

(1 Jn 3.1&4.9)

It has been a cold, wet spring, but I walked today in woods full of the song of small birds, a veil of fresh green covers the trees, the air was warm and the light strong to promote growth and life. I rejoiced in the signs of change, the reassurance that the rhythms which God has created continue at his command, and our world remains under his care.

For all power rests in his hands – no matter what the turmoil and tribulation of our planet might suggest – and we are the object of his love and affection; this beautiful world was made for us to care for in his name. It should be our joy and delight to live as careful stewards of all that is… I am so thankful for the freedom, health and strength to spend time outside in the countryside, appreciating the marvellous handiwork of our great God, and sharing my joy with him. I am encouraged in my spirit as I consider the detail of design, the boundless creativity, the heart-nourishing beauty, and thus my Lord and God sustains and refreshes me.

These past few months have been a testing season for me in many ways – with uncertainty over employment, over where we might live, over the jobs, health, and residence of family and friends. I have not found it easy to wait for the Lord to answer, not always appreciated the answers which he has given. I have been reminded again and again, that it is not I who orders all things for good, but God himself, and it is my part to trust him.

Many questions remain to be answered, with issues unresolved, uncertainties being prolonged; but I was reminded again today that I rest in the hands of the Lord, the maker and sustainer of all things, and that he calls me to trust in his love, wisdom and purposes in all that happens to me.

Lord God, when you spoke to Job of your power and the majesty of your creation, you did not answer his questions.. but you answered his spirit in its agony, and he found rest and peace as he worshipped you. Let me also rest in you; handing over my burdens to you and choosing to trust, praise and glorify you as much in uncertainty and confusion as in times of clarity, certainty and direction. Thank you, that the One who knows and loves me is the One who called the stars into being, and his power and love will never fail me! 

When I feel so useless..

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Declare what is to be, present it – let them take counsel together. Who foretold this long ago, who declared it from the distant past? Was it not I, the Lord? And there is no God apart from me, a righteous God and a Saviour; there is none but me…

“Listen to me, O house of Jacob, all you who remain of the house of Israel, you whom I have upheld since you were conceived, and  carried since your birth. Even to your old age and grey hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you. 

I am God, and there is no other; I am God and there is none like me. I make known the end from the beginning, from ancient times, what is still to come. I say: My purpose will stand, and I will do all that I please… What I have said, that will I bring about; what I have planned, that will I do… I will grant salvation to Zion, my splendour to Israel.

(Is 45.21; 46.3&4,9&10,13)

“When [our plans] are interrupted, his are not. His plans are proceeding exactly as scheduled, moving us always (including those minutes or hours or years which seem most useless, or wasted, or unendurable).” (Elisabeth Elliot; 1926-2015)

The sun is splitting the skies, the birds are singing and there is a tangible excitement as spring dances on the edge of our days, with so much light and colour and the promise of more to come.

And I am unwell; confined to the house; moving stiff and carefully; sleeping badly and feeling as though my world has contracted to a tiny space. What will I do with this challenge? Last week, I wrote that our speech and actions should not be determined by our circumstances… and now I am labouring to prove the strength of the Lord in pursuing patience, gentleness and acceptance of his plan for these days.

Such situations are always a good exercise in recognising how our ego likes to continually add up ‘worth-points’, totting up every activity on some invisible register which somehow makes me significant or valued by God. It is humbling when – as now – there is nothing to add up! Will I accept that for the moment, my Lord asks me to embrace inactivity, weakness and discomfort, and in and through those things, to find ways to praise him? There is so much to be thankful for; will I poison those good things by resenting what God has chosen to withhold? And surely that would show clearly that I value the gifts much more than their giver..

So often in these situations, I go to Elisabeth Elliot’s strong spiritual sense – she never pretended to anyone that being a Christian would be a bed of roses, and her uncompromising words brace me, showing me the truth – that my furious rejection of this season of illness is simply a tantrum of self, and a refusal to trust that God is good, and has a right to do as he pleases with his creation. I am not indispensable, and I am loved, saved and accepted not because of what I do, but because of Jesus’ love and death for me.

I have been brought into relationship with the God of creation, the Almighty and eternal One in order that I might share in his great purposes for the kingdom of Jesus. Do I believe that He will complete what He has begun? If I do, then my own part – anything which I can do is a privilege and not a means of earning my place – is entirely up to God to direct, and certainly not up to me to dictate! Pride and self-importance have no place in this relationship, all comes to me as God’s free and loving gift. The challenging and austere words of William Law show me how I can truly glorify the Lord in the trials of this time.. and also show me how very far I am from that state of highest faith and deepest trust.. may the Lord have mercy and sustain me to glorify him in whatever he may decree should lie ahead.

“Receive every inward and outward trouble, every disappointment, pain, uneasiness, temptation, darkness and desolation, with both thy hands, as a true opportunity and a blessed occasion of dying to self, and entering into a fuller relationship with thy self-denying and suffering saviour.

Look at no inward or outward trouble in any other view, reject every other thought about it: and then every kind of trial and distress will become the blessed day of thy prosperity. That state is best, which exerciseth the highest faith in, and fullest resignation to God.” (William Law; 1686-1761)

Real life, real faith..

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There, by the Ahava canal, I proclaimed a fast, so that we might humble ourselves before our God and ask him for a safe journey for us and our children, with all our possessions. I was ashamed to ask the king for soldiers and horsemen to protect us from our enemies on the road, because we had told the king, ‘The gracious hand of our God is on everyone who looks to him, but his anger is great against all who forsake him.’ So we fasted and petitioned our God about this, and he answered our prayer…..

On the twelfth day of the first month we set out from the Ahava canal to go to Jerusalem. The hand of our God was on us, and he protected us from enemies and bandits along the way. So we arrived in Jerusalem, where we rested three days…

Then the exiles who had returned from captivity sacrificed burnt offerings to the God of Israel… they also delivered the king’s orders to the royal satraps and to the governors of Trans-Euphrates, who then gave assistance to the people and to the house of God.

(Ez 8.21-23,31&32, 35&36)

A song of ascents.. When the Lord restores Zion’s fortunes, we should be like dreamers. Then will our mouth fill with laughter and our tongue with glad song. Then will they say in the nations: “Great things has the Lord done with these.” Great things has the Lord done with us. We shall rejoice.

(Ps 126.1-3; R Alter translation)

There is a task to be undertaken, something we are to do for the Lord – perhaps the life-long task of parenting; or the calling of godly living as a single or married person: perhaps something immediate and challenging, like a difficult conversation, or committing time and energy to a particular project. Every day, we are called to accept the duties and privileges of living as God’s image-bearers in our families, our communities, and to fulfil our tasks as well as we can for his glory and our blessing. Every day, there are choices to be made about how we live, what our priorities are, and whether we trust God to be sovereign over and in all that happens.

Ezra gives us so much to meditate on as he obeyed God’s call and undertook to lead a cohort of exiles back from Babylon to join the group already established in Jerusalem. His task involved a large and long term goal – the establishment of God’s law as the rule of life for all the people of Judah and Jerusalem – which was to be achieved by small daily steps of obedience and faith.

First, they had to get there.. a journey of many miles which took three months across potentially dangerous lands. Ezra recognised the risks – exacerbated by the fact they they carried great wealth with them – and began by calling the people to pray, committing themselves to God in faith, and asking him to honour his name and reputation by protecting them. There is no record of a particular answer, except in the actual experience of the travellers, which spoke clearly of God’s keeping! They asked, and then set off to act – demonstrating faith by living as if God’s promises would be kept.

Having first asked for help, and then experienced it as they obeyed, the people then formally and gladly thanked God for doing as they had trusted him to do! They had experienced the shielding love of God, and now worshipped and praised him for his faithfulness and grace to his people.

It is simple, and yet sometimes so difficult to do:- to ask, to act in faith, and then to take time to give God praise as we see and experience his work. We are tempted to wait for answers before undertaking the work, to look for supernatural guidance, when our sanctified common sense is there to direct us step-by-step. Ezra didn’t wait for a vision; he prayed and then went… Each day, I have the opportunity to take the next steps of service and obedience in the work to which I am called, the small tasks which are building God’s kingdom and fulfilling my purpose for his glory. Will I not trust the Lord to provide what I need for each task, each step? To live steadily and attentively by faith, is to live in thanksgiving, on the basis that what God has said, he will do – may I grow in such faith, that I might, like Ezra, be useful to my God and King.