Author Archives: eps992014

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About eps992014

a believer in the Lord Jesus Christ, a mother, wife, sometime runner, singer, gardener, and proud Scot

How long, O Lord?

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Not again, please, not again Lord:

Sudden death and destruction coming on ordinary people:

Hate erupting into horror, devotion to a cause driving men to desperate extremes and deliberate evil.

How can we bear it..

How can You bear it?

When You created us in Your image, it was not for this:

When You breathed life into us, made us spiritual beings, it was not for this:

O God, holy and pure, filled with light as we are filled with darkness, have mercy upon us.

We are pulling down catastrophe upon our race;  through hatred, greed, laziness and neglect we dishonour Your image within us, and wreak havoc upon one another and the world You created for us to cherish and enjoy.

O God, mighty and good, utterly just as we are utterly corrupt, have mercy upon us.

We are fully deserving of judgement, there is no goodness in us, except where pale reflections of Your image within us remain, and by their light serve to show how dark are our deeds and thoughts.

O God, faithful and true, steadfastly loving as we are fickle and unreliable as the wind, have mercy upon us.

Although the truth about You has been revealed through creation, and all may know that there is a God in heaven, we have chosen to worship instead the things of this world, becoming enslaved by our own desires and fears; have mercy upon us.

Today we kneel before You, in silence, acknowledging our part in the woes of the world, our own weakness and waywardness, and sharing the grief and pain of those who suffer. Today we cry out for mercy upon those who are in desperate need of comfort – for the body and the spirit. Today we cry out for justice to be seen and done for those who have been desperately wronged. Today we confess that we have sinned and fallen short of the glory which is Your perfect way, and we deserve condemnation just as much as the terrorist, the murderer, the oppressor and abuser.

Only in Christ, only through the sacrifice of the perfect one, do we have hope, and a promise for redemption. So in Him we trust, and out of our desperation we cry to You for this world to know and trust in Him also, that we might see peace, healing and fulness of life as all nations find their true fulfilment in following and worshipping Jesus.

Christ, have mercy;

Lord, have mercy;

For in You alone, our hope rests.

God of the impossible….

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“How hard it is for the rich to enter the kingdom of God! Indeed, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.”

Those who heard this asked, “Who then can be saved?”

Jesus replied, “What is impossible with men is possible with God.”

Peter said to him, we have left all we had to follow you!”

“I tell you the truth,” Jesus said to them, “no-one who has left home or wife or brothers or parents or children for the sake of the kingdom of God will fail to receive many times as much in this age and in the age to come, eternal life.”

(Luke 18. 24-30)

Many of us are familiar with the sad story of the rich young man who came to Jesus seeking assurance of eternal life, and who went away downcast, because Jesus challenged the stranglehold which his wealth had on his heart – he could not let it go, it had become his god. That is the point of the hilarious picture of a camel squeezing through the eye of a needle – it is simply impossible, laughable and to be dismisssed. In human terms that is… and that is the point which Jesus made to those who questioned how anyone could be sure of salvation if even a rich and law-abiding person could not. With God in the picture, everything changes!

It is God who can do the impossible. By his power at work in hearts and minds, he transforms people so that they recognise the idols which are dominating their lives, and brings them to a point where they can surrender everything to God as rightful king and lord. The proper names for these things are repentance and faith, and they are not once-in-a-lifetime experiences either. It is true that for many people there will be a particular occasion when they know that a decision has been made, to follow Jesus, to accept forgiveness for past sins, and to trust him for the future. But it is also true that as disciples, we spend the rest of our lives working out in each new situation, what we need to repent of and what it means to exercise faith in God as our trustworthy heavenly Father!

I think that I have a bad habit of forgetting what Jesus says in the passage I quoted above – that it is God whose ability and strength is the issue, not mine! How often do I look at a situation and feel overwhelmed, unable to cope with what is being asked of me?! If God is sending me along a particular path, then He is also providing the resources which I will need as I go – and I need to trust Him to be faithful, and to recognise the things which are holding me back.

The disciples pointed out to Jesus how much they had given up to follow him – and his response is a staggering promise, which holds good for all disciples, that no one will be the loser as a result of their obedience to God’s call on their lives! Do I believe him? When I am faced with the loss of something – or someone – precious to me, do I trust God to provide for the gap which will be left in my life?

How often do we ask God to show us in advance how he will replace what is lost, repay what we feel we are sacrificing?! That is not to trust him, that is not faith in the promise, and I need to guard against such an attitude when I am facing up to the prospect of obedience resulting in loss.

I know that God gives good gifts to his children, but also that everything I am and have is a gift from his hand – not deserved but freely given. I hold all things on an open hand, not in a closed fist, and must learn to say with Job -“The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord.” (Job 1.21)

My God is Lord of the impossible, and in any time of sacrificial obedience, I can and must trust him to do just that, to turn what seems an impossible sacrifice into one which I make gladly for his sake, and one which he will more than abundantly make up for, in the ways which he knows are best for me! Blessed be the name of the Lord!

Daily blessings

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Let the heavens rejoice, let the earth be glad; let the sea resound, and all that is in it; let the fields be jubilant, and everything in them.

Then all the trees of the forest will sing for joy; they will sing before the Lord, for he comes…

(Ps 96.11&12)

I have a great delight in trees, and my family and friends are accustomed to my stopping in the middle of a conversation to point out some particular specimen of notable colour, size or shape. Do you ever stop to consider how wonderful it is that God designed one of our primary sources of oxygen, in this way?! These amazing plants can live for hundreds of years, reach high into the sky, weigh hundreds of tons, and as well as being very efficient in recycling carbon dioxide, they are beautiful! God is such a marvellous designer, never sacrificing the form of his creations to their function, and so often leaving us in awe at the multitude of ways he varies the basic form to produce new patterns and structures! In every way, our trees testify to the greatness of their maker, they give glory to him who imagined and realised them, and continually direct our thoughts to worship and give thanks.

Living in a land where there are four distinct seasons is an extra blessing where appreciation of our trees are concerned! In winter, we can rejoice in the forms and patterns created by bare branches and trunks; in spring, the fresh greens take our breath away, and the delicate new leaves enchant us; in summer, the great heavy canopy of green provides welcome shade – from sun or summer showers! – and then comes autumn, like the triumphant conclusion to a great symphony, as the colours riot across the spectrum and the winds scatter the leaves across the streets and parks to create vast carpets of bronze and gold.

I was privileged recently to spend a day on the hills in Deeside with a friend; it was a perfect day, with not a breath of wind, not a cloud in the sky, and the sun hot on our backs. We rejoiced in the strength we needed to climb the hills, the eyes which enabled us to see the panorama of hills, the ears to hear the stags rutting across the glen, and thanked God for so many gifts poured into our lives all in one short day. And as we returned to our car, there came what felt like a special extra blessing.. We were standing among tall birches, motionless and silent, reluctant to leave this glory, when there was a slight rustling sound, and a few birch leaves fell around us – flakes of golden bronze, fluttering down gently to our feet. It was like a benediction, like the kiss which a fond parent gives a beloved child at the end of a long happy day, and we were overflowing with quiet joy.

I believe in a God of justice; a God who cannot live with the blight of sin and who will one day wipe it out of his creation for ever, making all things new, so that the little taste of heaven which I had that day will blossom into a whole new life, beautiful beyond my imagination.

I believe that I will have a home in that perfect place not because of my own efforts after holy living, but because in Jesus, I have one who has made me clean, and through whom I have a certain hope of deliverance from death.

I believe that this God, who loves me through Jesus, loves me as a beloved child, knows me intimately and has made me to know and delight in him. He has revealed his love through Jesus, but every day in so many ways, he chooses to give me personal assurances of his love. The trees are one of the ways that I often feel my Father’s loving touch and hear his song of love – but for each of us it will be different! He knows your heart, and knows how to nourish your spirit if you will let him. The words of the blessing spoken by Aaron over the people of Israel tell of God’s face shining upon his children – glowing like that of a loving father who is filled with delight simply in the presence of his own. Let this light and warmth bring great comfort and strength to our own spirits, grounding us securely in our faithful God.

The Lord bless  you and keep you;

The Lord make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you;

the Lord turn his face towards you and give you peace.

(Numbers 6.25)

Do you trust me?

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Do not fret because of evil men or be envious of those who do wrong; for like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away.

Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart.

Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this; He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.

(Ps 37. 1-6)

What does it mean to say that we trust someone? Sometimes it is that we respect their advice and wisdom, and would be strongly influenced by their counsel in time of decision-making. Other times it reflects a belief that a person can keep our troubles to themselves, providing us with a safe place to share our burdens.

On a deeper level, when I married, I entrusted myself to my husband, giving him access to my life and great power to affect me for good or ill. Why was I willing to do this? Because I believed then, and still do, that he loved me as well as his human frailty permitted, that he desired the best for me, and that he would be good for me. He has given me similar power in his life, and my desire always is to be good for him. I know that I have failed, and will do so again. I have been selfish, short-tempered, and unreasonable, at times unwilling to see things from his point of view because I know that he is right and I am wrong! By God’s grace, we have grown together, and will go on relying on his help to love and be faithful to one another – continuing to be open and vulnerable because we made a covenant together to trust one another in love.

It seems to me that over and over the bible reveals God asking this very same question of us, his children, “Do you trust me?….Do you trust me enough to do as I ask?” And ultimately, our answer to that question depends, as in human relationships, on whether we believe that the one asking for our trust really loves and wants the best for us. Consider Adam and Eve, stewards of paradise, with one single prohibition (given for their protection) that they refrain from eating the fruit of a certain tree. When Eve stole the fruit and persuaded Adam to eat with her, they were effectively saying that they did not trust God to be good for them, that He was unfair and unreasonable! How wrong they were…..

Consider Abraham, who was asked to trust God first of all for a new land which he had never seen; then for safe keeping in Egypt – which Abraham tried to arrange for himself by cunning, and ended up causing all sorts of trouble(Genesis 12). When God asked Abraham and Sarah to trust him for descendants, they showed that they had not learnt their lesson, and again tried to arrange it for themselves causing more trouble (Genesis 16). The hero of that sorry tale was God, who patiently and faithfully kept his promises to Abraham, allowing him more than one fresh start!

Consider David, who was anointed the future king of Israel many years before he was actually crowned, and who endured many trials along the way, when he might well have given up on God’s promise or else – like Abraham – have taken matters into his own hands. There were two occasions when David could have assassinated Saul most conveniently, but he insisted on trusting God to arrange matters, and held back.

Am I willing to trust God with my life, my children, my work and my church family? Do I really believe that God wants the best for us and that, unlike human promise-makers, He is able to deliver it?

What does this kind of trust look like in daily life? When changes come, do I fret and worry over things I cannot control, or do I strive to act and think in ways which reflect my belief that God’s ways for my life will always be the best – even though at times they may be painful and difficult? Am I willing not to interfere with God’s timing, not to grab the things I think He has promised but wait until they are poured into my lap?

If I truly believe that God has and will always keep faith with me, fulfilling His promises, then I must walk in daily obedience, not fretting over what I do not know and cannot control. I must do the present task, even when I see no clear path ahead.

It is my faithful obedience in all the small things, and my calm, joyful acceptance of God’s directing of my life which will speak most loudly of the love which I receive from Him, and demonstrate most clearly His trustworthiness. May I be given daily strength and courage to glorify Him in this way!

Glimpsing the big picture

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Blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked or stand in the way of sinners or sit in the seat of mockers.

But his delight is in the law of the Lord, and on his law he meditates day and night.

He is like a tree planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in season and whose leaf does not wither. Whatever he does prospers.

(Psalm 1. 1-3)

Do you ever stop to think who the Bible is about? We are perhaps too familiar with it, too at home with the stories and teaching, and may miss this crucial point quite easily until someone points it out. At which point, if you are like me, you become astonished at your own foolishness!

At a recent midweek church meeting, we created a visual representation of the story of the bible – the whole big  picture, starting at creation and ending with judgement and the new heavens and earth. Along the way, we fitted in each book of the bible, and some of the principal characters who feature – such as Abraham, David, and of course, Jesus. And it was at this  point that our minister pointed out that the whole story is actually about God himself, and his dealings with people. He is the principal character, and it is the purpose of the entire book to teach us about Him, exalt and lift Him up – not any of the all too flawed human beings who feature.

The whole purpose of the collection of books which we call our bible is to reveal the heart of God, his relentless love and will to draw to himself those who will love and delight in him. It is a love story, but one written on such a large scale that sometimes we get too bogged down in the messy details to see it! The point of so many of the stories about folk like Abraham and David, is that they are flawed human beings who make stupid mistakes and refuse to trust the God who has promised to do great things for them. And still God is faithful to them! It is not their deserving that results in good things happening for them, but God’s goodness and persevering love. That is a lesson which I need to learn over and over again.

Jesus did not identify particular parts of the bible story as relevant to him and his ministry, but said that all of it spoke of him – the ultimate revelation of God to man, God made man, living in our messy and broken world. The books of the law spoke of God’s holiness and purity, and desire that his children should share that holiness – because our maker knows that this is the way to fullness of life, we are formed for perfection! Jesus came to live the perfect life, and show us what it could look like. The history books tell of God’s calling of a people to witness to his love and faithfulness, and of their betrayal of him as they turn over and again to other gods, to kings, to anyone at all rather than their God. Jesus witnessed to God’s love and faithfulness, demonstrating at every step of his ministry a profound trust in his Father and belief that God would be faithful to keep every promise made to him.

And running through the whole old testament – the scripture which Jesus knew – is the theme of redemption, of restoration and a final dealing with the rebellion which separates us from God. From the first sacrifices to the final promises by prophetic word of a coming Redeemer; the hope of a real and lasting transformation is demonstrated. In Jesus, it finally came to pass, and as the temple curtain was ripped apart on the day of Christ’s crucifixion, so the barrier which has kept us from God’s intimate presence was destroyed for ever.

While it is good to wrestle with individual passages and knotty theological questions, we must never lose sight of the overall story within which they sit. The details may entrap us into fruitless speculation and unhealthy ways of thinking about God, but the great epic theme restores our perspective, and puts the focus firmly back on God. This is the surest way to keep our souls humbly depending on him, trusting and returning to him over and over as we journey through life. This is the way to ensure that we thrive, like that psalmist’s tree planted by the flowing stream. And perhaps it is this thought which lies behind one of the sweetest, simplest of hymns with which I will close today.

Tell me the old, old story of unseen things above,

Of Jesus and  His glory, of Jesus and his love.

Tell me the story often, for I forget so soon!

The early dew of morning has passed away at noon

Tell me the story always if you would really be,

In any time of trouble, a comforter to me.

(A. K. Hankey, 1834-1911)

May we each be willing to carry out this ministry for one another in the days ahead, it is the most loving thing we can do..

Glory and grace…

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Ascribe to the Lord, O mighty ones, ascribe to the Lord glory and strength. 

Ascribe to the Lord the glory due to his name; worship the Lord in the splendour of his holiness.

The voice of the Lord is over the water; the God of glory thunders, the Lord thunders over the mighty waters….

The voice of the Lord twists the oaks and strips the forests bare. And in his temple all cry, “Glory!”

The Lord sits enthroned over the flood; the Lord is enthroned as King for ever. The Lord gives strength to his people; the Lord blesses his people with peace.

(Ps 29. 1-3, 9-11)

I love feeling small, being dwarfed by beauty, might and power. This may be because I have never been at the mercy of nature as many of our race have – whether hurricane and typhoon, or flood or earthquake. I am awed and inspired by the beauty and power which God has released into creation – through all the laws which govern the air, earth and water. Do we sometimes forget to be in awe of these elements? It is good to remind ourselves that we are not as powerful as we might like, that ultimately we cannot control what happens, and that if we trust in our own strength, we will surely be disappointed.

Either through natural disasters, or man-made destruction, all the things which our race depend upon for life can be taken away. If our security and contentment are founded in those things, then we are looking in the wrong place for our peace of mind and hope for the future. But these great forces in themselves are not ultimately in control either!

This psalm positively reverberates with the sound of God’s voice: its power is proclaimed and celebrated in the most forceful ways to drive home the point that the greatest of natural forces is as nothing beside the Lord, and that He alone is worthy of our worship.

The word “Ascribe” in the psalm can also be translated as “Honour”, in other words we should give full praise to God as his right for his power and holiness. We do not in any way add to God’s greatness by our worship, but do we perhaps rob him in a way when we fail to recognise and exalt it?

Everything in creation apart from humanity brings glory to God simply by being, by fulfilling the purpose for which He created it – manifesting His imaginative power, His creativity and strength, His unfathomable command of physical laws which enabled the creation of universes beyond our comprehension. The flight of the tiniest birds; the obedience of the oceans to the forces which govern their movement; the infinitesimal growth of great trees over hundreds of years; and the haunting beauty of the Aurora Borealis, all bear witness to their creator’s greatness and glory.

And I? I struggle and pout and fret about getting things my way; I complain when life does not give me the opportunities I desire – for myself or my loved ones. I worry about the future instead of celebrating the present, and accepting that my maker in His wisdom and goodness knows what is best for me. This is our shame as a race, that we refuse to give God the glory which is due to his name, and instead set ourselves up as worthy of honour and all the effort and focus of our lives.

This is the miracle which time and again fills me with wonder and thankfulness, that this God, this Creator, whose glory fills the heavens and stuns me into silence, is the same God who knows and loves me personally. Through faith in Jesus Christ, my rebellion is forgiven and I am transformed into one who seeks to exalt and honour God as she ought – feeble though the effort may be at times… And through Christ, I know the tender and intimate love of God, the promise of a new start in this life, and eternal life to come. This is all grace, all the goodness of God poured out on the undeserving rebel to give her a second chance and set  her free from worshipping herself. I am never so full of life and joy as when I am abandoned in praise of my adorable Saviour; my tender Father; and my strong and powerful Counsellor. I am nothing, God is all!

These words from the great hymn by Oliver Wendell Holmes (1809-1894) put it so much more briefly and beautifully – may we all receive grace this week to glorify our God as He deserves.

Lord of all being, throned afar, Thy glory flames from sun and star;

Centre and soul of every sphere, Yet to each loving heart how near.

Lord of all life, below, above, Whose light is truth, whose warmth is love;

Before thy ever-blazing throne, We ask no lustre of our own.

The most important question..

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When Jesus came to the region of Ceasarea Philippi, he asked his disciples,

“Who do people say the Son of Man is?”

They replied, “Some say John the Baptist; others say Elijah; and still others, Jeremiah or one of the prophets.”

“But what about you?” he asked. “Who do you say I am?”

Simon Peter answered, “You are the Christ, the Son of the living God.”

Jesus replied, “Blessed are you, Simon son of Jonah, for this was not revealed to you by man, but by my Father in heaven.”

(Matthew 16.13-17)

I believe that our ultimate destination, our eternal future, is determined by our answer to this fundamental question, posed to us today as it was to Peter all those years ago. Who is Jesus? He himself was quite clear on the answer to the question – taking the names of Messiah or Christ, the Son of Man, the one promised down the years who would break forever the power of sin and death in human lives.

His whole ministry asserted his identity as one with God – power over natural and spiritual powers; authority to forgive sins and cast out demons; speaking with the words of God to woo the people of God. Those who rejected him, he stated quite clearly ‘will not see life, for God’s wrath remains on them.’ (John 3.36)

What then is our message as followers of Jesus in the world today? We are surrounded by the pain and struggle of mankind, fresh waves of upheaval and suffering arise weekly and our political leaders stagger from one crisis meeting to another. In Britain, our neighbours and colleagues have largely dismissed Christianity from their minds, dismissing it as so much nonsense, and embracing in many cases a rag-bag of ideas picked from many sources, which makes them comfortable with their lives.

I think it is very important that we keep clear in our minds the authority, power and providence of God – over and in ALL that is happening to individuals and our world at large. If we succumb to the temptation to think that our own words and deeds are the only things which can redeem people and transform society, we will sink into despair – either doing nothing because we feel powerless, or doing too many things because we can’t bear inactivity in the face of so much need and injustice.

The reality is that God is never mocked. He may appear inactive, but it is our vision which is faulty here, not His power. He cares more deeply than we can imagine for each and every one of His children, and desires that none should face eternity without Him. I believe that in every turmoil and trouble, God is at work to raise the minds of men and women to consider His claim upon their lives, and to recognise in themselves the ultimate sin, of putting self on the throne of their hearts.

In His grace, God may use those who already know and love Him to be part of the process by which He reveals Himself, but we have no power to force anyone to acknowledge Him as Lord. All we can do is to follow the example of the apostle Andrew, whose first action was to bring his brother Simon to meet the man whom Andrew already believed was the Christ, the promised one(John 1.41)

Since this is the case, as eager servants, it is our responsibility to be like the apostle Paul when he served the church in Corinth :-” For I resolved to know nothing while I was with you except Jesus Christ and him crucified.” (1Cor 2.2). We have the treasure of forgiveness of sins, a fresh start here on earth and eternal life with Christ to share with people who need it so badly, and the best way we can do this is by pointing them over and over to Jesus. We lift him up, exalting him in our lives and our words, so that people will see and have the chance to consider properly for themselves who they think Jesus is. Their decision is not in our hands, but we can strive to ensure that our witness is faithful, loving, steadfast, and always focussed on Christ, so that God can use us in His work of drawing them to Himself.

May God stir up in us a deeper love for Christ, so that our lives shine for Him, and give us courage to speak of Him whenever the opportunity arises. May we be blessed to be used as the means by which others are brought face to face with Christ, and come to acknowledge him as Lord of their lives.

Praying for my children….

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Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade – kept in heaven for you, who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time.

In this you greatly rejoice, though now  for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. These have come so that your faith – of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire – may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honour when Jesus Christ is revealed.

Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls.

(1 Peter 1. 3-9)

How often when praying for those dearest to us do we find ourselves asking God to keep them safe, to make their path smooth, and trouble free? It is all too easy, and very natural since as parents we expend so much time and energy in protecting and nurturing them as they grow! But is it healthy for their growth in faith? I fear not, and this passage from Peter’s letter would suggest otherwise. It is of course very painful for parents to see their children suffer, or drift away from faith in the God whom we believe is yearning over them. I do not wish in any way to minimise how we struggle to bear it when our children are in trouble, or how our own faith is tested in those circumstances.

Nonetheless, we do them no favours if we will not recognise that their lives are outwith our control, that they belong first and foremost to God, and we cannot control his dealings with them! For some parents, this will entail watching a child walk deliberately away from faith, with no guarantee that they will live to see them return. For others it may be a time of physical or mental suffering, perhaps a broken relationship or failure in some cherished ambition or career path. Even for the child whose path appears to be smooth and secure, there is never any guarantee in our sin-sick world that it will remain so, and nothing can be taken for granted.

So how should I pray? Obviously until they come to personal faith in Christ, our prayer will be that God will be at work to remove the barriers to faith, drawing them to himself, and convincting them of his claim to be lord of their lives. We must accept that the paths they take may not be those we would choose. For as long as they deny Christ as lord, their decisions will not be based on seeking God’s will, and how could we expect otherwise? But they are never further from God than anyone else, no less likely to be reached by His love and power, and so we pray with confidence and trust in His saving grace for their conversion.

And for believing children, I think the most important thing we can pray is that God will be at work by his spirit in their lives to create resilient faith. What do I mean? I mean faith which is strong enough to weather storms, to face darkness and hold fast to God’s promises. The kind of faith which is modelled for us in so many places in the bible, by real people who endured struggle and loss and yet trusted in God. Think of Joseph, all those years in an Egyptian prison; or David, on the run from Saul and wondering if his promised kingship was a daydream; or Esther, who put her life on the line for her people, believing that she was God’s instrument at that moment for their deliverance.

This is the faith which Peter tells his readers is being created in them as they face persecution, and is it not true in our own experience that it is only as we face the reality of our own helplessness that we fully learn to rely on God? Am I modelling that kind of faith for my children? If I am serious about praying for my children – and in fact any disciple of Christ – then I need to pray for their trials and struggles, that they would glorify God in and through them by standing firm in their faith. God never wastes our experiences of trouble if we accept them as opportunities to experience and witness to his grace and perfect goodness in meeting our needs.

May we, and those we love, learn to say with the Psalmist:

Yet I am confident I will see the Lord’s goodness while I am here in the land of the living.

Wait patiently for the Lord. Be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord.

(Ps 27. 13&14)

When there are no words….

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You have put me in the lowest pit, in the darkest depths. 

Your wrath lies heavily upon me; you have overwhelmed me with all your waves.

You have taken from me my closest friends and have made me repulsive to them.

I am confined and cannot escape; my eyes are dim with grief.

I call to you, O Lord every day; I spread out my hands to you.

(Psalm 88 6-9)

This psalm is unusual because although – like many others – it contains great depths of lamentation and grief, there is no respite, no lightening of the darkness. The author ends his prayer-song with the heart-breaking verse:- “You have taken my companions and loved ones from me; the darkness is my closest friend.” (Psalm 88.18)

We are left to sit in silence, reflecting on the dreadful experience of suffering which has been poured out, and sharing in the unresolved tension between the psalmist’s conviction that God can save him, and the brutal reality of unabated suffering.

It can be hard for us to be silent in the face of suffering. If our faith is of any value then it must have an answer for even the deepest pain. We believe in a God who is all-powerful, loving and just; surely then there will be reasons to give and grounds for optimism? And if we cannot find answers, we fear that our faith is worthless, a mere folly and delusion.

My thoughts have been prompted by the many I know who are either suffering themselves from long-term mental health issues; or whose children are suffering in this way. For all our mastery of the tools of medicine to heal our broken bodies, we are still relatively powerless in the face of eg. severe depression, bi-polar disorder, and that demon which haunts the parent of every teenage girl, anorexia nervosa. To watch one’s own child disappear into the darkness, to see them destroy themselves and be unable to forestall the dreadful end is a torment beyond the imagination of those who have not experienced it.

What can I say when I meet such people? What has my belief in the risen Lord Jesus Christ, in the eternal loving Father and the ever-present Spirit got to do with their agonies?

My faith is in a God who cared so much for a world hopelessly marred by the rebellion of humankind against his loving lordship, that he suffered the outrage of losing his own son to the darkness in order to heal us. His compassion for our plight is where I must begin when I meet those who are lost and raging against the oppressive darkness which is upon them. May we be so filled with God’s love that we do not shy away from such encounters, fearing the pain we might witness. May we be the means by which the presence of God is made real to those who suffer, weeping with those who weep – like Job’s friends who sat seven days in silence with him. Sometimes no words are needed.

I believe in Jesus, who while he walked among us witnessed great suffering, and saw the impact of pain upon the faith of the people. He dealt so gently with those who were struggling to believe in the face of their troubles, commending even the smallest grain of faith where he found it. Remember how Thomas was finally drawn out of his desperate doubts by Jesus? There was only encouragement, no rebuke. Our dear Lord knows that when we are in the dark – for ourselves or perhaps even more for those we love – that our faith is shaken. Let us then recall the words of Isaiah describing the Saviour’s gentleness :- “a bruised reed he will not break, and a smouldering wick he will not snuff out,” (Matt 12.20). May I be willing to pray for those who can barely pray for themselves, and to trust that God hears and will answer. We depend on his keeping of us, not our hold on him, and what a relief that is!

Finally, let us pray for ourselves, to be strengthened in our faith, willing to live with mystery, and not defeated or broken by the suffering which God graciously permits. The book of Job is very precious in this context, with its overriding theme that we are unable to understand the ways of God. Our comfort lies not in getting all the answers, but in encountering our great God. Only then can our trust in him be renewed.

I believe that one day, in glory, all our suffering will be seen to form part of God’s re-creating of his world, his making all things new, and of glorifying his beloved son, our Lord. In the great wonder of God’s providence, nothing is wasted.

These few words barely touch a profound mystery, but I pray that God might graciously use them to help us to think and live in accordance with his word.

the Lord gave and the Lord has taken away; may the name of the Lord be praised

(Job 1.21)

Lists, and more lists!

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Oh, how I love your law! I meditate on it all day long.

Your commands make me wiser than my enemies, for they are ever with me.

I have more insight than all my teachers, for I meditate on your statutes.

I have more understanding than the elders, for I obey your precepts.

I have kept my feet from every evil path, so that I might obey your word.

I have not departed from your laws, for you yourself have taught me.

How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth!

I gain understanding from your precepts; therefore I hate every wrong path.

(Ps119.97-104)

I have been privileged to sit all my life under the ministries of men who believed that the bible is the Word of God, a living and powerful means by which God speaks to and transforms people. Week by week, I have listened to sermons which present the words of these ancient texts as relevant to my life, full of meaning and to be taken seriously. I have been comforted, challenged and taught – and I pray that will continue, as I am by no means a finished piece of work!

In addition to believing that the bible must be preached in order to see lives transformed, my ministers have all practised what is called “systematic exposition”. This simply means that they have chosen not to avoid any part of the word of God on the basis that it is too hard, too embarassing, or in some way irrelevant. A book is preached through from beginning to end, and studies undertaken in the Old Testament as well as the new. Our current series in church is looking at the visions of the prophet Ezekiel – challenging for both minister and congregation! It is not a radical approach to preaching, but puts into practice what Paul said to Timothy in his second letter to the young pastor :-“All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man(and woman) of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” (2Tim.16&17)

Naturally, different types of book require a different approach – the visions of Revelation and Daniel for example cannot be preached in the same way as the Gospel narratives; while the epic stories of the Exodus and early days in the Promised land are different again from the letters to the young churches in Asia. But the basic fact remains, that all of our bibles are there for a reason, for our good as we hear what God will teach us through them.

I think it is wonderful that every kind of literature is found in our bibles – and every aspect of life and feeling too! There is nothing about life on earth which is outwith the interest of God, and no area of our lives which is beneath his notice. He knows that some of us are moved more by great stories than by poetic images; that some respond better to direct instruction while others learn through narrative and example. That is not to say that it is good for us to only study those parts of the word which appeal to our own temperaments – that would be like basing our weekly family menu around everyone’s favourite holiday treats! I am grateful to my ministers over the years for making sure that I study the parts of the bible which I find harder to deal with, and for giving me the conviction that the struggle is worthwhile!

Recently I have been reading in Nehemiah, a book which contains many names of people long dead, and it is tempting to wonder why anyone recorded, let alone bother to read them. But have never found yourself scanning a long list for one particular name, perhaps a friend who is due to qualify in a particular course? Or perhaps you had a family member who engaged in past conflict overseas, and you search the records for their name, for proof that they were there and perhaps of some award for bravery or endurance? Sometimes, the presence of a name is of huge importance for us.

The book of Nehemiah records a significant time of national rebuilding, of re-commitment and return to faithful worship of God after exile. In the years after it was written, one can imagine the descendants of those first returnees listening eagerly as the story is retold, waiting for the name of their ancestor to hear again the confirmation that they played their part, and obeyed God’s call. I picture the children cheering when they hear that particular name, rejoicing that their family is recorded as being part of God’s great people, that they belong. I like to think that one day in glory I may meet these faithful servants, and rejoice with them that my name too has been included in the lists of those whom God has called to be His own for ever!