Monthly Archives: February 2026

Drowning the noise…

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Why do the nations conspire, and the peoples plot in vain? The kings of earth take their stand and the rulers gather together against the Lord and against his Anointed One. “Let us break their chains, ” they say, “and throw off their fetters.”

The One enthroned in heaven laughs; the Lord scoffs at them. Then he rebukes them in his anger and terrifies them in his wrath, saying, “I have installed my King on Zion, my holy hill.”

(Ps 2.1-6)

You, Lord, are forgiving and good, abounding in love to all who call to you. Hear my prayer, Lord, listen to my cry for mercy. When I am in distress, I call to you, because you answer me. Among the gods there is none like you, Lord; no deeds can compare with yours. All the nations you have made will come and worship before you, Lord; they will bring glory to your name. For you are great and do marvellous deeds; you alone are God.

(Ps 86.5-10)

I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone – for kings and all those in authority, that we may lie peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness. This is good and pleases God our Saviour, who wants all men to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth.

(1Tim 2.1-3)

How long, O Lord, must the earth raise such a din of defiance and despair to her creator?

How long, O Lord, must the weak endure exploitation and the strong become ever more intoxicated and deceived by their power?

How long, O Lord, must the truth about your King, the Lord of Love and Peace, of Justice and Wisdom, be drowned out by the strident triumph of evil as it harnesses human weakness to its own ends?

How long, O Lord, must your faithful people strain to hear your summons to truth, to trust in Christ, to believe that you are truly on the throne and that your kingdom will prevail?

How long, O Lord, must we stick our fingers in our ears in order to shut out the scornful, acid-dropping mockery of our neighbours, loved ones and all those who condemn our folly in trusting that there is any reality beyond this physical world? 

Father, I am so tired of trying to believe your promises; trying to believe that in spite of all that I see and can’t help seeing, yet Christ is on the throne, and you will prevail. The noise is exhausting, and so hard to block out – I feel like a fool when I try, like an ostrich sticking its head in the sand and hoping the darkness and the fury will go away if I pretend it isn’t there..

I DO believe that Jesus came to die for this broken world, so beloved by you. I DO believe that one day all will be made new, and that the din will be silenced, to be replaced by the songs of your redeemed and the renewed, full-throated praise of the whole creation as we rejoice together in the age to come. BUT I am so tired now, so very tired of trying and failing to hold together your promises and my lived reality.

In my weakness, Father have mercy and hold me fast. In my confusion, Father have mercy and speak clearly through your word. In my bruised and battered senses, cowering under the onslaught of darkness across our world, Father have mercy and open my eyes afresh by your Spirit to the beauty of this world as it speaks of you; open my mind to discern that your power is undiminished and you are at work. In my smallness of vision, and narrowed hopes, Father have mercy and speak truth – so that I might not dishonour you by faithlessness or despair. Even as the prophets spoke amid ruin, cruelty, loss and fear – boldly proclaiming your covenant love and power for your people, promising a future eternal kingdom and perfect king – so let me hold fast in the midst of darkness, proclaiming the light.

Let me learn from your apostles, who went to a world full of darkness, with good news, and whose focus was not on political regime change, or peace-movements, but on gospel proclamation and living. Let me learn to be more urgent and earnest about sharing Jesus than about anything else, and thus be an instrument fit for your purposes. Let my enemy not disable me through despair over this world when you have revealed your eternal victory over all evil. Oh Lord, let me not give way, but be kept firm in faith and hope and love, for Jesus’ sake, Amen

Yes, but….

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Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. 

Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.

Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled.

Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy.

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God.

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called sons of God.

Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

(Matt 5.3-10)

Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death…. You .. are not controlled by the sinful nature but by the Spirit.. and he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who lives in you.. For you did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you received the spirit of sonship. And by him we cry, “Abba, Father.” The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children… in the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.

(Rom 8. 1&2,8,11,15&16)

One of the most wonderful things about being a believer in Jesus, a follower of the Master and precious to Him, is that we are fully equipped against our old accusing enemy, the Satan who continually desires to distract, disable and drag down God’s people by asking, “Did God really say?”

It is a favourite ruse of our enemy to whisper so closely in our ears that we mistake his words for our own, and are thrown into distress and confusion! And when the whispers are telling half-truths, they are even harder to differentiate from the actual glorious reality of God’s true words about us. This situation calls for wisdom, and also humility: wisdom to weigh the words before we react to them; and humility to recognise that any assault by our enemy necessitates an immediate call for help from our great and victorious elder brother, Jesus. God has promised that He will always be with us, and that He is greater than our enemy – that implacable foe is losing; every day, in every way, he is losing ground to the true King of Kings. In Jesus, we find all the help that we need – his peace, his all-sufficient atonement for sin, his wisdom and his power to keep us and bring us safe home to glory.

As I contemplated this, I wondered whether we sometimes make it easier than it should be for our enemy to mislead us. When a soldier takes their eye off their commanding officer, off the goal and off the instructions which they have received, it is much easier for their enemy to take them unawares, to injure and disarm them. As a follower of Jesus, I have a clear view of my commander – in – chief, and I know what he has called me to do. But sometimes I get confused about how to work it out in practice, and then I hear that insidious whisper that turns my attention inward, away from Jesus and towards my own weakness, errors and disobedience.

If my focus is on the ways that I remain prone to sin – that weakness which will only finally pass when my mortal body is destroyed – then I am playing into my enemy’s hand, and he can tie me up in knots of regret, unproductive mourning over my state, and unhealthy self-preoccupation. Yes, it is true that sin is going to remain part of my life until I die… BUT, that is not the whole truth!

The bigger picture, the full and glorious truth is that I am completely forgiven, and that an incredible, abundant, merciful love has paid completely for all that I will ever get wrong, and I am free to live without guilt or shame. The accuser cannot use my past or my current failures as means to bind me in the darkness – Christ’s death and resurrection has broken that power.

Heavenly Father, I rejoice today in your grace and mercy. I stand in Christ alone, the object of your redeeming love, and praise you.

I choose to focus not on my sin, and all the negativity which so readily drags my eyes from Jesus. I choose to focus on your love and abounding goodness, shown to me for His sake. Let my theme not be of my own weakness and failure, but Jesus’ beauty and power. When I am aware of letting you down, may I not fall into misery, or self-condemnation, but rather turn that awareness into an eager embracing of your grace; into praise for my sufficient Lord and Saviour, and into joyous abandonment to his loving care. To His Name be all the glory, Amen!

And breathe…

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Then the Lord answered Job out of the storm.  He said : “Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundations? .. Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know? Who stretched a measuring line across it? On what were its footings set, or who laid its cornerstone – while all the morning stars sang together and all the angels shouted for joy?

“Have you ever given orders to the morning, or shown the dawn its place, that it might take the earth by the edges and shake the wicked out of it?… Have you journeyed to the springs of the sea or walked in the recesses of the deep? Have the gates of death been shown to you?.. Have you comprehended the vast expanses of the earth?”

(Job 38, extracts)

My heart is not proud, O Lord, my eyes are not haughty; I do not concern myself with great matters or things too wonderful for me. 

But I have stilled and quietened my soul; like a weaned child with its mother, like a weaned child is my soul within me. O Israel, put your hope in the Lord both now and evermore.

(Ps 131)

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God.. and hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

(Rom 5.1,2&5)

I sometimes feel that I have spent much of my adult life trying on different roles, looking at other people and wondering if I ought to be more like them. As I approach my elder years, the pattern persists, and my thoughts continually dwell on what I ought to be doing as a responsible, adult, servant of God – doing with my time, my talents, my body. I can’t seem to get to the place of peaceful maturity which I see in so many other people, and which looks so comfortable! I know that my salvation and identity as God’s beloved child is assured to me, and to that degree, I am at peace with my Father because I live in his love – the only true foundation for peace in this world.

But I remain restless and deeply unsure about what my time and energies are for.. I try one thing, then another; I compare my life and habits to other people and wonder if their pattern is the one for me. I hear an interminable inner monologue of doubt and uncertainty; and underlying that doubt is a major weakness, which is the desire for someone else to tell me exactly what I am for and how that should work itself out day-to-day in my life.

The monologue has been particularly loud in recent weeks, and while I am – obviously – praying for wisdom and the Lord to be working through this to bring me to a fresh discernment and peace in His calling, I also need to be actively seeking ways to switch off the inner voice.. This morning, that looked like a walk near our house, which takes me by a swiftly running river, through great trees and a broad parkland, past beautiful buildings and hardly any busy roads. It was a deliberate step into God’s handiwork, and having chosen to leave my phone at home, it was also a choice to keep all my senses engaged with my surroundings.

And how quickly the Lord met me with his gifts of love – the sense of cold fresh air on my skin; the beauty of the great cedar tree reflected in the water; the calm and focussed absorption of the fisherman with his graceful line floating over the surface; the fascinating immobility of a heron, sheltering in a waterside thicket and seeking food; the sound of running water and the joyous abandon of a dog racing after a ball, every line of its body expressing the joy of being alive.

I returned home refreshed in spirit, and full of thankfulness for the miracle which it is to be alive in God’s good world, and to see, hear, taste and touch the good things which He so generously gives. I am calmed, and reminded that it is ok not to understand, ok to find life overwhelming at times, ok just to slow right down and to be.

Loving Father, I thank and praise you for the gift of this day’s life in your amazing creation. I thank you for the truth that I am safe in your arms, and you love me – no matter what muddles I get into in my thinking about what I am for. Thank you that you delight in me as I am. Thank you that you are so much greater than I can possible imagine, and that your love will never run out. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Losing it.. or gaining it?

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And God spoke all these words: “I am the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery. You shall have no other gods before me.”

(Ex 20.1-3)

Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. you guide me with your counsel, and afterwards you will take me into glory. 

Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion for ever.

(Ps 73.23-26)

Then Jesus said to his disciples, “If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself an take up his cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it. What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?”

(Matt 16.24-26)

“The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. Whoever serves me must follow me.. My Father will honour the one who serves me”

(Jn 12.25&26)

I have always loved the words of psalm 73, where the author speaks so passionately about his hope in God, and boldly asserts that nothing else really matters to him compared to knowing that this almighty and eternal being is also the One who cares for and keeps hold of the psalmist. When life is calm and comfortable, it can be easy to speak these words, and to believe that I mean them, since my heart’s desire truly is to honour and love God above all other things or beings. But God takes us at our word, and through the circumstances of our lives, He will give us opportunities to put this claim into practice, to learn what it really means to desire God more, and to hold everything else lightly.

As I grow older, and my friends also age, I am watching life become more and more challenging. I see bereavement, chronic illness and pain, the persistent straying of children from their faith, the natural effect of ageing which diminishes strength and capacity, and can even rob us of our identity as our minds succumb to disease. I see people being steadily stripped of all that defined them – their relationships, their hobbies and activities, their service in the church community, their fitness, their cognitive abilities, every semblance of control and agency. What remains? What is the believer being called to do in this season of loss?

The gospel tells us that of ourselves, we have nothing which can win salvation, no merit except what we are offered by God’s grace in Christ Jesus. We are perhaps used to that idea – of having nothing to offer – but how do we react when God chooses to give us the opportunity to live it? This stripping away of all that we naturally hold dear – so many of God’s good gifts, by which He has blessed us and enriched our lives, and enabled us to live and serve him joyfully down the years – what is this season offering me? What am I being invited into?

All that ultimately belongs to me is my identity as God’s child; only His claiming and redeeming of me gives me any significance. But that significance – by His grace in Jesus – is eternal and is the source of life, the life that is real, the divine life which equips me to share in my destiny as God’s child with him in the new earth and heavens. This cannot be stripped away, not even by the loss of cognitive ability which may come to me. This cannot be lost through bereavement or physical degeneration and the limitations of age-related illness and weakness. I AM and always will be, beloved and secure and at home with my Lord, and one day will know the fullness of that life where sorrow, pain and loss are unknown, and all that seems to be lost to me now, is more than restored.

I believe that as I age, and experience all the stripping away of cherished roles, gifts, experiences, I am being offered the opportunity to depend in a wholly new way on the faithfulness of my Heavenly Father, and to rejoice in my identity in Him. As I face loss, I am invited to gain in intimacy with God, in peaceful acceptance of His providence, in mature faith which sees the ever-brightening future glory and trusts for the daily gifts of strength and endurance, joy and hope to reach it.

Dear Father, thank you that you know how much your children shrink from suffering of all kinds, and in your mercy, I pray that we will find help and grace in our time of need. Let our ageing, and all that it brings, work your will in our lives. As we lose, so also may we gain. You have promised that those who follow you will be with you, and that promise is our hope.

Give us daily courage and strength to trust you; in our grief over loss, may we keep on turning to you for aid, to keep us faithful and hopeful, obedient and surrendered to your will. May we prove your faithfulness as we enter this season, and find that although it may look like a wilderness, yet you bring springs of living water to our lips and songs of joy to our hearts as we taste and see how good You are. May we have the honour of witnessing to your faithfulness, and saying with the psalmist that although our heart and flesh have failed, yet you are our all-sufficient portion, for ever. In Jesus’ precious name, Amen.